Growing up

••anger issues••

"Ugh just stop the yelling please," I say from my room as loud as I can while holding my crying sister in my arms. I hear footsteps from the stairs that stop at my room I can't tell who it is until he walks into the room. "Sorry sweetie me and you mom had another fight" ''Yeah I kind of know," I said sarcastically.

My father reaches for my sister she just moves closer to my chest. I can see the hurt on my fathers face as he looks at her tear stained face. I've lived with this all my life.

That night I got my bag with my clothes and my sisters and sneak out with her. I know where I'm going and she's already waiting for me. "Hey," I say breathlessly she smiles at me with a warm hearted smile. She surprises me with a hug. She looks over to my sister and gives her a blanket. "It happened again...Cally I'm tried of it" I say she stays silent, I know she's listening "I was left alone to raise my sister my mom isn't even close to her my dad is getting there" she looks at me with sorrow and empathy.

We get to her house faster than I thought we would. She opens the door and greets her dad I hate to say this but, I envy her not in a bad way but more in a sorrow way. Wishing I had her life. "Hi Mr.Irwin I'm so sorry I came unexpected but it happened again this one was big again I apologized" "No no it's ok your fine your like a daughter of mine Katherine where is Lilly I haven't see her in so long." After that Lilly came running into Ashton's arms.Then she started crying again I was the only one who knew why.

I mean they knew as well but they only know bits and pieces. Know I know you might ask why I'm not crying cause I grew up on this I only had cried once that was the first time they fought after that I grew tough. Then my sister was born for once in my life I thought everything would be okay but I was completely wrong. My mom left me at a young age alone to take care of my sister. She would come home drunk or just angry. My dad noticed to late. By that time Lilly was already 10 while I was 14 I was raising a child by myself.

I had been pulled out of my thoughts when Lilly came and hugged me I rubbed her back as she kept crying this was almost a daily routine. "Hey the rooms ready Katherine and, Lilly yours is to come on now it's getting late we don't want you up all night" Mrs.Irwin said also known as Bryana I don't call her that or Ashton by their real name cause it makes me uncomfortable. The only fucking thing my parents taught me is to have manners lucky I passed that on to Lilly. "Thank you Mrs.Irwin" I said she took Lilly up to her room as Ashton pulled me to the side.

"I'm sorry Luke and Arzaylea are fighting again they always do this" he said to me I look at him he has the same soft eyes as Cally "It's ok if they wanted to change it they would have already but they don't, they're probably fucking right now" Ashton's looks at me and laughs cause he knows it's true. "Come on now Katherine, Cally's waiting for you" I go up the stairs a flash a smile to her.

Cally's in her room it's so pretty well that's what I say my room looks like shit. Because of me, I have anger issues ever since my parents started fighting. Cally knows all the holes in the walls of my room is because of them. Her room is beautiful it's white and simply decorated she gets it from her mom. I take one of the records off of her wall of music is what she calls it I didn't notice I grabbed my dads album I wanted to throw it and break it until I realized its not his fault is my moms. I go to her record player and play "carry on". This song helps me cope with my problems. My dad played this song and sang to it when I was a child. Cally put her hand on my shoulder her face full of concern...that's when I realized I was crying.

That night I snuck out and went home my father was sitting on the couch and crying I went up to him and started to hug him tightly he was surprised I could tell but he took his arms and wrapped them around me. "She's the fault y'all sneak out and go over to Ashton's she's the reason Lilly isn't even close to me she's the reason why you were left alone to raise your sister w-while I was at tour" I look at him with my blue eyes and wipe the tears off of his face. I hugged him tightly "where is she?" "She...left" I looked at him with worried eyes.

That night I stayed there I would pick up my sister in the morning. My mom left ugh I hate calling her mom she can't even be called that. I am more of a mom Lilly calls me mom sometimes I let her because she deserves one. Luke Hemming's awe yes I can call him a dad cause he is one he cares for us it's just he's not around you see my dad is a young rock star...still living the dream. I didn't even notice I was crying until my dad ran into my room concerned. "She's a bitch dad why did you even marry her I know she maybe wasn't like this before but this is who she is now" "A worthless piece of shit that doesn't even know how her fucking daughter is doing in school I could be failing she wouldn't even care". I look at him his eyes are blood shot...he was crying.

Crying.

For.

Her.