My Mom's a Man

I'm Getting WHAT?!?!

(Pic above is not mine nor do I know who it belongs to. Enjoy.)

Peter Kirkland was an extroverted boy. He loved to be that center of attention no matter what it took to be it. He would do anything from singing and dancing to hitting and kicking. So, at the orphanage, he was pretty infamous and lonely. His one friend Piper barely ever spoke to him without saying something rude. I guess you could say that life at the orphanage was nowhere near sunshine and rainbows.

One day, Peter and Piper were sitting down by the pond just behind the orphanage's shed, barely in view of the nuns, talking about anything and everything, until they got into the topic of adoption.  "Piper, what do you think it would be like to have a true family?" Peter questioned.

"Well, I'm not quite sure, but I think you'd get a fuzzy feeling in your tummy, like if you ate a caterpillar or something."

"You're silly."

"You're stupid."

"Shut up."

"Make me British baby."

"You're the baby. You're younger than me."

"So, you're still a big baby, so there. You're a stupid, ugly baby."

"I could say the same about you Kangaroo hopper."

"You can't call girls ugly, Peter."

"Just did, Pee-per."

Piper then pushed Peter into the pond and laughed until she felt as if her sides would explode. Peter's mostly white attire turned transparent which only fueled Piper's laughing fit.

"You're practically naked!"

"Hey, it's your fault!"

A new voice came booming down upon them, it was feminine and strict and the same time, so it could only have been a nun.

"Peter, Piper, get inside! It's starting to rain, and oh my goodness, what have you done to your clothes young man!"

"Piper pushed me into the pond."

"Don't put the blame on someone else, boy."

"Sorry sister."

"Don't apologize to me, apologize to her."

Peter said his apologies and of course, Piper only chuckled in response to his embarrassment and of being wrongly accused.

The two friends made their way inside, and when they got there something more than surprising sat before them. A table full of cheering children and a banner with the words,"Congratulations Peter and Piper!!!" Yes there were three exclamation points.

Peter was the first to speak up,"Um, Sister Marie, what is going on?"

"Well darlings, you are getting adopted. Not by the same person of course, but you both will have new homes waiting for you in about a week, so get ready loves."

The two children stood there absolutely stunned. They were getting adopted. Huh. The nun spoke again,"Piper, you are getting adopted by a very nice man named Ralph Kirkland who lives with another charming young man named Toby. And you Peter, you are getting adopted by a, well, couple of young men named Berwald Oxenstierna and Tino Vainamoinen," Wow. Those names were hard to remember,"And remember young ones, one week."

~~~time skip of destiny~~~

This was it. Peter had already said goodbye to his best and only friend, and was about to meet his new parents.

As he sat in the office he pondered what they might be like. He knew that they were both men, which seemed a little odd, but chose not to worry about it too much. Could they be, loud and flashy and tell those awful dad jokes all the time? Or maybe be those quiet but loving parents? Or strict and harsh? These thoughts flooded his mind until at last, the door to the office swung open, and in walked two men that would pave his road to life.