Sad thoughts xo

a letter to the one who broke my heart

Well, its 2:30 a.m. as I write this. I woke up dreaming of you with my heart beating out of my chest, as my chest caves and everything like a storm inside as my tears burn my cheeks. I thought I could just forget you like that. Push you out of my head and heart painlessly. But,oh how I was wrong. This hurts more then I'll ever tell you. Maybe you care and maybe you dont. Maybe I'll never know. I've rewritten this six times on paper and pen and each time it seems to hurt a little more. The ink smeared with every tear. The ink a puddle of color like the inside of me. I'm sorry for the way I hurt. I'm sorry for messing up. I'm sorry for being annoying. I'm. Just. Sorry. For. Every. Little. Stupid. Thing. I've. Done. I don't know if you ever lied about how you felt but I never did. I meant every "I love you" I said. They say love is giving someone the power to destroy you and you hoping they won't. Maybe all the things I did, was the reason why. Or maybe not. How long had you felt this way? Was it weeks? Days? Hours? Months? How long were you acting? Maybe if I had a little more time I would have told you soon why I do what I do or feel the way I do and opened up. I never let myself love someone fully. I always kept one foot on the ground. Every single time love has burned me...