Draco's Heart (a Harry and Draco fanfic)

Midlife Crisis

I was an awful person. People always looked at me like I was evil, I WASNT! I helped Harry during the war by giving him my wand, but nobody ever remembers that. But the thing is, at 32 years old I had made amends with most of the people I hurt, including my cousin on my dad's side, Lara. Lara hadn't gone to Hogwarts, she went to that all girls Wizarding school who's name escapes me. She had two sons and constantly told me that I should start a family. She was my only friend, but I still couldn't tell her why that would never happen for me. I was in love, I had been for many years. With someone who would never love me back.
His name was Harry Potter.
I had realized I was gay at 18, after the war. I had realized all I had against Harry was because I loved him, I was jealous of everyone around him. That was why I called Hermione Granger that filthy word so many years ago. But this isn't about Hermione, it's about me.
It all started when Lara called me from the market. I was sitting in my small flat, it was small because I had cut myself out of my father's life and unfortunately his money. I was looking out my window at the view of London, wondering what Harry was doing. No! I had to get him out of my mind. I was 32 years old, I had to be done with dumb crushes. I scratched my forearm where the mark of a death eater still sat. It was faded, and almost gone, but still there reminding me of my past mistakes. My phone rang.
"Hello?" I said.
"Draco! I need your help right now!" Spoke Lara almost to quickly for me to understand.
"Why? What's happened?"
"Can you take Will to his play date with a couple children? Sean has a piano recital and having a five year old who
missed his play date there would cause screaming."
"Why me? Can't the father of your children do it?"
"Draco, please. Frank was going to but his meeting is running long, and Will really misses his Uncle."
"Where when and who is going to be there?" I sighed.
"The mothers of the children, it's actually kind of a birthday party. Some of them actually went to Hogwarts.....Huffelpuff I believe. It's 1238 prince road and it's in 25 minutes, Will is at home right now, keys are under the mat. Thanks! Love you, kisses."
"Lar-" she hung up.
Oh no, what if I know these women. No matter, I promised my cousin.
I put on a light blue shirt with long sleeves to cover my death eater mark, got into my car and drove.
Little William Malfoy-Park was the most hyperactive child I had ever met. I couldn't wait to get to that party. I loved Billy as if he were my own son, and he loved me as if I was his second father, but that day he was being just plain annoying. We pulled up to the house.
Billy ran out of the car and waited for me to knock on the door. A woman answered.
"Hello?" She questioned.
"Hi, I'm Billy's Uncle. Lara asked me if I could take him to the party."
"Oh! Well, all us moms are in the kitchen whilst the kids play, would you like to join us?" She asked.
"I'd be delighted, what is your name by the way?"
"Helena Funner, and yours?"
"Draco Malfoy." I said, hoping none of the Huffelpuffs inside had mentioned me.
"That name sounds familiar..." She said.
"Did you go to Hogwarts?" I asked.
"Oh! You went to Hogwarts! That's wonderful. I didn't but a couple of girls here did." She said.
We walked in and she announced before I came into the room that it was Billy's uncle here and not Lara. I walked in and shyly waved. I felt so awkward.
"DRACO MALFOY!?" Said a woman. I turned and it was no other than Cynthia Waters. She was a muggle born who was in Huffelpuff. I remembered her.
"Hello, Cynthia. Nice to see you again." I tried to be polite. Seeing her made me feel awful inside because I knew I was awful to her. I distinctly remember making her cry.
"Well it's definitely not nice to see you, Malfoy." She replied.
"UNCLE DRACO!" Yelled Billy. I stated that I'd be right back and I had to check on my nephew. I heard whispers from the kitchen, I knew they were about me. Billy had stepped on a Lego and I had to talk him out of blaming someone. When I returned to the kitchen I didn't know Billy was following me.
"-a mud blood." Said a lady as I walked in.
"What's a Mud Blood, Uncle Draco?" Said Billy. I was mortified to hear him use such language. I got onto my knees to look him in the eyes.
"It's not a nice word, Billy. And I don't want to hear you use it ever again." I said.
"Why?" Spoke Cynthia,"I recall those words leaving your lips plenty of times in the past. Directed at me."
"Cynthia, you have to understand, I'm not the same person I was fifteen years ago." I tried to calm everyone down.
"Hang on...." Said a different woman, who I vaguely recognized, "you were Slytherins's seeker! You were possibly the rudest person I ever met! You were that boy who hated Harry Potter!"
"I was." I said, "Was!"
"He's a death eater as well." Said Cynthia.
"What!" Yelled Helena, mortified that she had let a death eater into her house.
I was about to explain how I was no longer a death eater when Cynthia walked up to me and pulled the sleeve up on my right arm, beating my mark.
"Oh my dear lord." Said a horrified woman.
And with that I flipped.
"ENOUGH!" I said and pulled my arm out of Cynthia's grasp. "What do you want me to say? Yes I was an awful wizard? I KNOW! I called people Mud Bloods when I was a child? Yes I did that too! How am I supposed to prove I'm a decent human being if everyone looks at me this way. So what? Yes, I duelled Harry Potter! Yes my father was Volemorts second command! Yes I was a death eater! Yes I helped Severus Snape kill Albus Dumbledore!" I couldn't believe I just said all those things.
"Take Billy and leave my house right now." Said Helena, pointing her wand at me.
"Alright." I said, defeated. And we left.
I called Lara in the car, I was fighting back tears.
"Hello? This is Lara Malfoy-Park."
"It's Draco. I'm dropping Billy back at your house. I called a baby-sitter and she is already there."
"What happened? The part was supposed to last until five?"
"Things. I'm not welcome there anymore."
"Draco-"
I hung up. I looked straight ahead as we drove. Why? After all I'd done in the past fourteen years since Hogwarts. I just wished....I just wished my life would go as planned, I wished that people wouldn't look at me as if I was some sort of monster. This was it. My midlife crisis. I began to cry.
"Uncle Draco?" Said Billy.
"I'm fine. Allergies." I replied.
I finally dropped Billy off and went home. And then I cried some more. What happened to me? I thought. I used to be so strong, and here I am. Lying on the floor crying like the child I am. I had had enough. I took out my wand. I hadn't used it in around a three years.
I'm going back into the world of wizardry I thought,I will be the good guy. I will talk to Harry again. I am no monster. I will be who I was truly meant to be.
I began casting spell after spell. I destroyed my entire apartment. I casted stuplify on to a mirror and accidentally sent myself flying. I landed in the tattered up ruins of my couch and began to laugh.
"I'm acting mental." I said out loud.
Just then, there was a knock on the door. I heaved myself up and went to open it.
"Lara?" I questioned seeing my cousin and best friend on the other side of the door.
"Draco, what happened!?" She exclaimed. Apparently my couch landing wasn't as soft as I thought a do had a bruise on my chin. Lara looked down at the wand in my hand. "What the hell is going on!?"
"I'm having a midlife crisis." I said calmly.