Ending Innocence (boyxboy)

Chapter Ten

“I need to-“ He cuts me off sharply. “No, you need to make sure he’s still breathing. Please do that for me.”

I ear against his mouth. Listening to his shallow breathing. Every breath is like music to my ears. I do my best to keep my composure, but it’s not easy. Not easy at all. I want to kiss him again, hoping that like in that stupid fairy-tale, he’ll wake up and I’ll know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is okay. Wanting to and actually doing are two completely different things though, and I just about restrain myself and keep my ear where it is. He looks different. Oh so different and it’s terrifying to see him so lifeless.

“Come on, angel, wake up. I need to see those beautiful brown eyes.” My whisper dies against his chest.

“Keep doing that, it’s helping, even if you don’t realise that.” Dante says, tugging on the fabric around Luca’s wrists.

“Why isn’t he moving?” I hear the broken sob in my voice. “Why did he do this? Was it because of me?”

“No, it wasn’t-”

“The ambulance is here,” Ty shouts into the room.

Paramedics rush into the room. Crowding around him, the two men check everything. They look calm, calmer than I think they should be. He’s fucking bleeding. That’s clear as day. They don’t seem to be worried about that fact. That pisses me off. They should be worried. My angel could die and they are cool about it. One of the men looks at me, his blue eyes fill with compassion, but I don’t want compassion. I want them to save my angel. The other paramedic whispers something to the blue eyed guy and they start to rush.

“What’s going on? Tell me.”

Dante comes back into the room. I grab one of them who shoves my hand off his arm. One talks to Dante while the other gets the stretcher under Luca. I blink rapidly. What the fuck is going on? Both men lift him and start moving. Dante tries to grab me, but I move away roughly. I don’t want him touching me.

“They think his lungs are struggling, he’s not breathing properly.” He sounds resigned.

“He’s going to be okay, you’ll see.” I say to him. “Everyone will see. Luca’s going to be fine, just fine.”

I push past him and run down the stairs after Luca. Dad and mom are already in the car, Ty follows me out, getting in the car beside me. The tears are threatening to fall again, but I hold them in. I can’t lose it, not yet. Ty and mom try to talk to me, offering kind words of comfort. None of it means anything. I don’t want their kind words or their comfort. I want my angel to be alright. He has to be. I just kissed him. I just had my first kiss, he can’t be dead.

“Caden, calm down, you’re hurting yourself.” Ty’s voice sooths. I look down, my hands are balled into fists. My nails digging into the skin. I don’t feel it.

“Don’t tell me to fucking calm down. Just shut up. I’m not worried about my fucking hands.”

“Caden…” Ty tries again.

“No,” I snap. “No Caden anything. I don’t want to talk about this. I have more important things on my mind.”

He mumbles around words, trying to find the right ones. Like there are any words for this situation. It’s not like you see this every day. I don’t even want to think about what that means. It’s not going to end badly. He’ll be fine. Luca’s strong and he knows I love him… Right? I mean, he has to know what those kisses meant. They were supposed to be the beginning for us. Not the end, this can’t be the end. I feel that wretched sob again. It’s there even as we pull up to the hospital.