Sinking(dis.cont)

I'm Sorry

A/N

Above is the picture of the locket featured in this chapter.

I hide beneath the bed. Hoping it would hide my ragged breathing; hoping whoever it was would leave me alone.

But I knew that was too much to ask for

Two dirtied boots sauntered around the bed. They were covered in leaves and mud.

That's how they knew how to find me. I had left a trail through the woods.

It seemed like hours that those boots hovered above my head. But he had made his mind up. Slowly, his entire body was lowering to the ground. At this point I was in full on panic mode. He was going to find me!

It was now or never.

With as much force and momentum I could muster I brought my legs round under him. Knocking his entire body cleanly to the ground. He had dropped a large metallic pole. Not a gun. I still didn't want to take any risks. I grabbed the pole and locked it around his neck.

Round hazel eyes stared up at me. It was a boy who seemed no older than 15. His clothes (or what remained) were in rags. His skin had sunken into his skull. He was literally a bag of skin and bones.

His pale face was smeared with mud and blackened soot. One eye was swollen shut, as blood trickled down his mouth. Reopening old wounds. They would never heal not without medication. I glanced back to his eyes that were pleading with every ounce of his being to let him go.

Yet I couldn't

I tightened my grip further. "Who sent you?" I screamed at him. Looking everywhere apart from his face. His hand appeared to be trying to reach my face but I threw his arm to the ground. I pushed the pole down even further and screamed again. "Who sent you?" Again no response.

I finally looked back to his eyes. The same round hazel eyes didn't look the same. Realisation dawned they had glassed over.

I had killed him.

By now tears were streaming down my face, from where I didn't know. I hadn't had a lick to drink for days nor could I remember the last time I had eaten a proper meal.

The pile had dropped out of my hands and I was slumped against the bed.

What had I done?

I had just killed someone. I didn't know them but their corpse seemed to be dragging into my conscience. What would my mother say? I didn't even dare think. I knew what my brother Danny would say. 'It wasn't your fault.' Despite this I knew better than to listen. He'd only say it to make me feel better. And I knew that this was all my fault. If I had just listened. 

I reopened my eyes from my deepening thoughts just to see the image of the motionless body I was trying to expel from my mind. A glint of metal caught my eye. It was a plane dulling silver locket that was gripped in his hands. He was trying to give me the locket. I cautiously untangled it from his cold hands. Making me wince every time I came into contact with his skin.

I dangled the locket from my hands. Too scared to actually open it. In the end, undying curiosity got the better of me. I tugged at the at locket's clasps with my two hands; it opened with a tiny squeak.

Inside there was a yellowing picture of a woman who had a gentle knowing smile. She stood with who I assumed was her husband a tall dark lanky man. If I didn't know better I would say they were in.... love. I dispelled the idea quickly. It was absurd- no one had the luxury to be in love. It would be a complete novelty! Though this wasn't what alarmed me. A second picture was glued to the other half of the locket.

It was hastily glued in still it didn't obscure the clear image of a smile. My smile. The picture was taken when I was about twelve but 5 years on I still had the face of a child. The question looming over me was - why did he have a picture of me? I stared at the stationary corpse desperately trying to make connection in my mind. Nevertheless my brain came out blank- empty.

A small song of birds woke me out of my reverie. I inspect my watch. It was probably the only luxury I owned- a very useful luxury. It allowed me to keep track of time. 2 hours. I had wasted 2 hours  just to sitting here. It was time to leave.

I rummaged through his pockets hoping for as scrap to eat. Came out with a packet of crumpled crisps and wasted rubbish. Guilt soaked my hands. What had I become stealing from a dead man after killing him? Just thinking about it filled my head with shame.

Before I left I grabbed my backpack and ambled towards the body. I leant over him and shut his lids over his eyes. I hesitantly took the locket and wrapped it around my neck not wanting to leave it. I wanted to give this boy no older than 15 a proper burial but knew it would attract too much attention. So this is what I do.

I stash the corpse under the bed. Then I whisper a small apology knowing that in no-way it would make up for what I've done.

"I'm sorry..."

A/N

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