Held Between Two

Chapter 1

To me, it was considered a form of 'cheating' (by Aaron and me), though I had to say, I was not given any chance to refuse or stop this from happening at all. Furthermore, I must emphasize this point clearly: He is my cousin. He was not any other guy that I knew of that was not blood-related to me. If he was one of them, at the very least, I don’t think that I would be feeling like this right now. -- Overwhelmed, puzzled, worried, guilty, sad and most of all, fearful.

Thirdly, we don't love each other romantically, and in fact, we weren't even close at all. In my opinion, we were almost enemies. No, not "almost" for his case, I believe. More likely than not, he had already seen me as one and that could be seen easily from the way he had treated me.

There was once he made me a fool in front of everyone in the school. I could never forget that one single day of humiliation, embarrassment and hatred I felt towards him. It was during lunch and I was walking towards the usual table I would sit at, holding a bowl of hot noodles in my hands. I saw him right there and at first, I thought it was weird as he would usually sit with his group of jocks and sluts, where some of them were from cheerleading, but I didn’t think anything of it. That was until he proved me wrong, damn wrong. It was not 'nothing', it was a trap, a trap that he had purposefully set up for me to fall right into it.

He deliberately lifted his leg up and tripped my feet over. I toppled and fell hard onto the ground. My hands lost its grip of the bowl of hot noodles at the same time, and I panicked. My eyes went wide open, but before I could react to save the noodles, I felt my body connect with the ground. An excruciating pain shocked right through my body, and it was my knees. I believed it would no doubt leave me this huge and ugly blue-black for weeks, somehow expecting that everyone who saw it would ask me what happened.  However, if I had to say, it was very fortunate that the bowl of noodles did not reach me as it poured all over the ground despite creating this huge mess that I knew that I had to clean up all by myself afterwards.

That was not all that he did. In order to torture me more than he already had, he laughed very loudly. All I could hear was his laughter echoing down the entire canteen, seemingly trying to attract even more attention. His laughter never ceased, only until after what seemed like a century. Furthermore, even when he stopped laughing, I swore that I would do anything to wipe that devil smile off his face but I wasn’t able to as it only made me feel even worse than before; I was devastated, to say the least.

He was totally satisfied at my pathetic state which he landed me in. His famous smirk was his way of telling me 'You deserved it.' I tensed. My entire body was trembling from the feelings of pain, hurt, and humiliation but, most of all were actually hatred I felt towards him. My fists clenched tightly, daring myself to stand up on the spot and smack that annoying smirk off his face. I wanted to let him know that he was not getting to me so easily and he was not the 'king' of the school. However, I couldn't do it. I hated to admit it but I wasn't strong enough to go against him, not when my body was in such a terrible and pathetic state at that moment. 

After knowing this incident that had happened, did you understand why I said he treated me as his enemy? Let's just say, this was not even his 'masterpiece' yet. -- That was, to put me to shame and literally torture me for his personal entertainment and for god-knows-what-reasons-he-might-have. There were simply countless times that he made me feel this way – these feelings of desperateness, over and over and over again.   

Last but not least, I don’t freaking remember anything at all! – like, how we even ended up in this room, got ourselves in our birthday suits and done the damn deed that I would never do with someone I don’t love, but it all happened to me!   

Yes, I totally freaked out now.

Then and there, I was brought back to Earth by his hand on the back of my head, pulling me towards him in an instant. Before I could even respond, his lips were on mine, moving oh-so-gently. I wanted to scream, shout and run away, or at the very least, push him off me; but I realized that I couldn't. I was way too stunned, confused and messed up inside. Furthermore, the fact that he had and has been training for the school's basketball team ever since he was that little 7-year-old kid didn't help at all. He was way too strong, or rather, muscular for me to even make him move an inch away.