Coming Out (Lesbian)

I have to tell them

I have to tell them
 all the secrets and lies tare me up at night 
as if I dont get the word out 
im going to be eatin up inside 
I have to tell them
why do they have to be so homophobic
judge mental hypocritical
non-understanding
its obvious they dont understand
the impact of the judgement has on me
I have to tell them
tell them how much it hurts inside
to be eatin up alive
by these lies I share its my life im trying to spare
I have to tell them
 that their seed is like no other
 not even compareable to her mother
I have to tell them
please spare my heart
this isnt easy to say
I feel as if my heart is going to cave
as I lay here in a daze 
I keep yearning and thinking
I have to tell them
I try and try to hold back as long as i can
but each passing day I keep going insane about
I have to tell them
have to tell them the truth
 the living truth at that 
just so I can show them the actual proof
I have to tell them
tell them how I feel
 aside from their judgement
tell them and show them a love so deep
so strong not really understanding
how much longer my heart will hold on
 hold to these lies trapped and baried
deep inside 
inside my soul where the pain and
the hurt unfolds 
it feels as if im trapped behind a wall
 a wall of damaged love pain and scares
I have to tell them 
tell them the truth of the pain that lies behind 
my tear-filled eyes
I have to tell them that love is more than just a gender
 more than sex and more than man and woman
I have to tell them that love is true
even though the lies are killing me softly inside
I have to tell them 
tell them my secret
my biggest secret in order to satisfy this craving
a craving to have everything in the open
in the open where i dont have to worry about my 'secret' 
I have to tell them
have my life on display maybe they can fully understand
their daughter is gay...