A Forgotten Whisper

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        Ingrid

        My rusty red hair falls into my face. Again. Failing to stay behind my ears. My head bobs up and down as I ride down the gravel road. Listening to the frogs croaking, the bees buzzing, and the crackling of the old Ford's wheels against the rocks beneath my open window.

        My blue eyes wander around the scene that lay before me. Meadows of rolling green pastures scattered with cows and horses. Gold poppies sprout up alongside the dirt paths, standing small next to the tall trees sheltering the roof of my truck. Their branches covered in vivid green leaves and vibrant pink blossoms.

        My eyes go wider, like always, at the beauty flashing through the windshield. The occasional bug smudging its tiny body against the old pickup's mirror. I just breathe and admire the breathtaking landscape. Occasionally sighing, thinking of Luke.

        My brother sits beside me, steering the wheel with both his hands. His fingers turning white with tension. Anger filling his bones. He looks straight out at the road, not speaking a word. His silence making me feel even worse. The pain in his eyes digging holes in my heart, slowly slowly slowly killing me. He saw me walk into the house, drenched in rain. It clinged to my tight tank-top and dripped from my hair. He could barely look my way without spitting in disgust. He knew I was with Luke. He always thought the worst. But he won't ever understand. So I don't try. Luke has already made his way into my heart. And I won't let him out.

        But the worst thing is that Matt won't reply to me when I give an explanation. He gives me the silent treatment. He knows he's torturing me with no words. He wants me to feel disciplined. Like he's my father. But uh-oh, sorry brother! You'll never be my father.

        Oh, and to make matters even worse, today is the first day of school. I'm starting my senior year. My last year of High School before college. And my brother hates me for wandering off with a boy right before the first day of school. Personally, I don't blame him. But he doesn't trust me and I won't give him such respect.

        I shrug my shoulders trying to release the tension and the nerves that squeeze my brain. I gently flutter my lashes closed and say a prayer in my head. Jesus, please let today be a great first day. Let me be calm and free and me. Guide me down your path for my life and keep my eyes set on you.

        I open my eyes to look down the narrow path, fixating on God's glory. His amazing fingers painting such art. Nature. I just gape at the beauty and breathe. In, out, in. Out. Just sitting and thanking God. Thank you Jesus thank you Jesus thank you Jesus...

        A kick at the back of my seat startles me from my prayers. I turn back to see Jay, my little brother, pulling tennis shoes onto his little feet.

        "Sorry Ingrid," Jay says, "These shoes are a little hard to get on."

        "That's okay, buddy," I say gazing down at his little squished toes that were forced into 5 sizes too small.

        "Maybe we should buy you a new pair. They are looking a little small," I smile jokingly at him, "Maybe Matt can take you shoe shopping after school?" I ask questioningly at Matt.

        "I have work," he mutters, "but sometime this week we can go. Okay, Jay?" He says peering at him through the rear-view mirror and giving him a small wink.

        "Okay!" Jay says with a big smile worn on his face, "maybe I could even get the batman ones my friend Quincy has!"

        "Well, I don't know, bud. We'll see," Matt answers, his eyes now glued to the road.