At the End of the Day

Chapter 10 It can't be real

"Suicidal whore." she said in a whisper ashamed of it. Is that how her parents see me? A suicidal whore. That hurts but I don't care that is just one person. One person doesn't matter.

"I'll be leaving today. They say I have a bright future. I'll keep in touch with you but they can't know. I'll miss you Beth."

"I'll miss you too. You are one of the best friends I have ever had." she left before any one saw her with me. It can't get back that she was here.

   I went to the lake before I had to leave. It has a lot of memories in a short period of time."Josh I'll do better, I promise. I'll be back before you know it." I headed back to the house. The car was ready by the time I was back. I gave Peet a hug good bye and we were off.

   "Hello my name is Helen Grey. I'll be the one you stay with for the next few weeks." Her hair was black and she had a pale complection. Her eyes were that emerald green that looked beautiful with her skin color. She looked about 25 or so. She was beautiful. It's hard to believe that she cut.

"So you use to self harm?"

"Yes. That is why I volunteered to help you. I want others to have a chance at a happy long life  You loved your husband a lot didn't you? What about Mr. Johnson the baby's father do you love him?"

"Yes I loved Josh with all of my heart. I tried to love Johnson but I'm still having a hard time because I..."

"Didn't want the baby and you don't love him. Believe it or not I went through some thing similar to what you are going through now. I was in love with a guy my senior year. We were going to get married after graduation. I went to a party. Seems okay right. Some guy drug me up the stairs into a bedroom. I fought with all my might but eventually I got tired. When I told my boyfriend I was pregnate he left me. I was pregnate with a baby that was not his and he hated it. On graduation every one knew what happened and had nothing to do with me. I was known as the easy girl. No one knew the real story because they were all drunk and high. I felt so alone and I hated my life. I went and cut my wrists and drank until I was dead."

"But you're here?"

"Yeah. My neighbor called 911. They came and saved my life. It was a close call. I stayed in the mental hospital for months. They druged me so I would stay calm because I went insain. I finally calmed down on my own with the help of a woman. They eventually let me out."

"Wow. That is awful."

"Yeah. We all have our sad stories some worse than others but all are bad."

   We arived at her house it was out in the middle of nowhere. Just the way I like it. I done small things to keep me occupied and she kept a close eye on me to make sure I didn't hurt my self on purpose.

   I was here for about six days when Helen recieved a phone call.

"Seems when you get back they have a suprise for you."

"Really? What is it?!?"

"I can't tell you that is why it is a suprise. Don't worry in eight more days you can know what it is."

   The days went by. Some fast and some slow. We talked, worked, and relaxed. I couldn't wait to see what the suprise was though. Finally it came down to the day where I would go home.

   "Well Beth you have improved. You know what that means?"

"I get to go home?"

"You got it. I'll leave you to pack. We'll be on the road by this afternoon." I packed all my stuff which was not much.

"You all set to go?"

"Yeah."

"All right let's go." We crawled in the car. It is going to be a long ride home so we just talked for a little bit.

"You know Beth I'm going to miss you. I had a great time with you. I'm glad I was able to help you."

"I'm going to miss you too and I'm glade you were willing to help me." The rest of the ride was quiet because she knew that there is a good chance that we will never see eachother again.

   The weird feeling is back. The same feeling I had when I had when we rode to her house. After about ten minutes I fell asleep. Thinking about just things I lived through and remembered. The only one I could remember at the time was one of the conversations between me and Josh:
~"If some thing ever happens to us what should we do?"
-"Well I don't want to live without you, Beth. But if I die... I would want you to let some one else in if the right person came along."
~"Same. I know how hard it is to move on though. I have had a lot of crushes in the last six years... Okay just three but still. I don't want to live without you. For the first time in forever I'm actually happy. Me being with you has given me a good reason to be happy and I don't want to loose you."

   Josh saw Johnson as the right person and I have been shutting him out. Josh would have wanted me to give Johnson a chance. When I get back I'll try and give Peter a chance. Try to love him. To be happy with him.

   "Beth we're here." I looked out the window. She is right we are here. I am home. We pulled in the drive. Peter was there to meet me.

"How was your vacation?"

"Pretty cool. How was your vacation with me gone for two weeks?"

"Aww it was wonderful." he said jokingly. "Come on in I have a suprise for you."

"Helen told me you have a suprise. What is it? Tell me. I'll act   suprised." He looked back at me with that face that says really.

"I can't do that. It's called a suprise for a reason. Wait here on the pourch with your eyes closed until I come for you."

"Okay." I waited for a minute or two before he came back out for me.

"Alright keep your eyes closed. When you get in I'll lead you to the couch but keep your eyes closed."

"They are closed." I hate suprises because I don't know what it is. Things go running through my mind until I found out what it is. We finally made it to the couch.

"Okay. Keep your eyes closed I'll bring out your suprise." He really is keyed up by this really big suprise. Makes me wish I knew what it was though. Maybe a welcome back party or some thing.

"Are your eyes still closed?"

"Yeah they are still closed." He walked in with my suprise then sat right next to me on the couch. It is weird because it does not smell like him. He must have changed his body wash or some thing. The real thing is it does not seem like him. The presence of this mystery person is not clicking who it is.

   I have a suprise infront of me and a person next to me.

"Hey Helen should we give her her suprise to her now or..." he was whispering in her ear. She laughted and replied, "No..." now she is whispering in his ear.

"Okay. I'll blindfold her." He blindfolded me then lead me back to a car. I heard three doors close.

"Is Helen coming too?"

"Umm... Yeah she just has to get something real quick." I heard the door close again.

"Hey sweety. I just had to get my phone really quick."

   We rod for what seemed like forever before the car finally stopped. Helen helped me out of the car. Then her and Peter guided me to some where.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see. I think you are going to love this."

   I could feel the grass under my feet. We might be at the park for a suprise picnic with every one or some thing close. We finally stopped. They helped me sit down on what seemed like a blanket. Yep I'm right we are having a picnic. I'm just waiting for every one to jump out yelling suprise.

   "What is my suprise guys? Can I take off this blindfold yet?"

"Hold on Beth it's not ready." I listened real closely to hear when they were walking up but it sounded like Peter and Helen were walking away. I heard nothing. I waited about two minutes. Knowing I was alone.

"Great. What a suprise. They leave me blindfolded alone."

"Not alone." I snatched off my blindfold to see who said that.