Something - Jadine Short

Tired

Nadine

I was at a cliff overlooking Korea, taking pictures of the beautiful view when my phone rang.

When I saw who was calling, a big smile spread across my face. Yassi was looking at me out of the corner of her eye. "Hello," I answered the phone.

"I miss you," James said softly.

My breath caught. I'll tell you later when I'm sober, I remembered him telling me last night. "So, hindi ka na lasing?"

"Nope."

"What's up?"

"Oh I'm on my way to the Smart event... Stuck in traffic sa EDSA. How are you?"

"Great! Nagpipicture lang ako, ang ganda ng view dito James!"

"Oh yeah, I saw your pics on IG! Mother's back!"

"The experience is too good not to post. So I'm off my hiatus! Mother's back!" I laughed. I heard honking on the background. "Mukhang malala diyan ha."

"May forever talaga sa EDSA. But it's okay, as long as I'm talking to you."

"Clark, ikaw ba yan? Tigilan mo nga ako, James."

He laughed. "Seriously though. I haven't forgotten that you didn't answer me last night."

I tried to play it cool, but my insides were turning to mush. "I didn't realize you were asking a question."

"Nadine! You are so unfair!"

I wasn't trying to be unfair. But I'm a girl. An emotional one at that...

During our first movie, Diary Ng Panget, we were shooting the body heat part. The script called for a hug. Under the rain.

"Body heat," James said. While topless. My gosh. I almost missed my line.

"Ano?"

"Body heat," he repeated.

And so I stepped in for a hug as required by the script. But let me tell you, my heart was beating like crazy. I was pretty sure he could feel it, what with his nakedness and all, but he didn't say anything. And I was grateful. I smiled my kilig smile while in his arms.

"Cut!" Direk Andoy yelled. Then he proceeded to check the scene just shot from his camera.

I pulled away so fast, I almost fell. James looked at me questioningly. "Are you okay?"

I shook my head and decided to speak my mind. "I don't know how to do this with you." As much as I can, I try to speak in English around James. Just to make him feel more comfortable around me.

"Uhh... Same way you'd do it with other partners you've had?"

"But you're too... You're too..." I stammered.

"I'm too what?"

"Hot!" I practically yelled, then covered my face with my hands.

He threw back his head and laughed. "You're real. I like that."

I peeked at him, and removed my hands while a smile went up the corners of my mouth.

"Look, Nadine, I know we barely know each other. But I'm just the same as the next guy." I started shaking my head, then he said "Siguro mas gwapo lang talaga ako than most." Then he made a face. I think he was going for ugly. He failed miserably.

I laughed. "Ewan ko sayo!"

"There you go. Nag-tagalog ka din. It's okay to speak in Tagalog around me. I can understand, and it helps me practice."

I laughed again. "Buti naman! Ninonose bleed na ko sayo." I was silent for a while. "Hindi ko kasi alam how to act around you. Ikaw kasi big winner ka, the James Reid. Sino ba naman ako? Isang hamak na Nadine Lustre lang."

"Hey look. Boss Vic paired us up for this movie. It's our first starring role, so really, we're on the same boat. I want to make a name for myself and not just be known as the PBB Teen Clash 2 big winner. There's really no reason to feel awkward around me."

To my surprise, he took my hand. He looked me straight into my eyes. "I say we make the most of this. Whatever happens, at least we gave it our all. Are you with me?"

I nodded. Pakiramdam ko parang nabunutan ako ng tinik. Naging smooth sailing ang shooting for DNP since that day...

"I think alam mo naman James na I've always felt something," I said softly over the phone.

I heard his sharp intake of breath.

"Look, Nadz, I don't want to force anything but I'm actually tired of denying it. Tired of the constant conscious effort not to fall. Just tired."

My heart felt like it was going to burst.

"I just want to stop being tired," James finished.

I knew James well enough to know that this is the closest he would ever come to confessing his feelings. And it's okay, because I wasn't fully ready either. But I knew exactly how he felt.

"Ako din, James. Pagod na pagod na ako."

Then I grinned and I knew he was grinning too.