Faking It

Prologue
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Faking It:

Her lips pressed against mine. Her wet lips never left mine. She left me breathless. I no longer had air to breathe and it felt as if I was relying on her to live. She was my air. My lap carried her weight as she began to rock her hips on me. We didn't stop. We didn't want to stop. I didn't even hear the door to my apartment open. My hands had been gripping her bare ass in my palms when someone cleared her throat. 

Noel stands at the bedroom door with her arms crossed. I sound like a complete ass when I say her presence did not falter me. I wanted to keep going. It was Noel's choice if she wanted to stay or not, but either way, in no way was she going to affect me. I'm my owned goddamn  person.

On top of me, the girl stops eating my neck and rolls over to get a good look at Noel. I know she doesn't care that she only wears her lace bra and underwear. That's the good thing about these girls, they don't care. They want their good time, but have no self respect nor dignity. To them, I'm a fucking god, and when they get on their knees, its for me. They kneel to me and get me and all my fucking glory.

"Could you maybe go somewhere else please? We need some privacy please." Noel heeds no attention to the girl on my lap. She doesn't even look me in the eye. "Oh and please don't sit on the couch, we don't know where you've been." She calmly comments before shutting the bedroom door. That's the Noel I know.

"Can I help you?" My anger was already beginning to show. Somewhere deep down, I know I probably don't have a right to be angry, but I am. I am that she's here. 

"What the fuck do you mean 'can I help you?' You know what, yes you can. You can help me fucking understand what the fuck you're doing." She's mad. When she's truly upset in any way, she swears. Too much. She rarely even swears on the daily.

"Should I have left a sock on the door? My apologies, I'll get on that right away." My mouth curls into a smug smile. 

"Alex why are you doing this? Why are you always doing this?" Noel begins running her fingers through her hair frantically. I'm surprised she's not on the floor screaming or crying yet.

"Why am I always doing this? Noel do you know how stupid you sound right now? We're done. This ended already, you're just trying to dwell. And if I had to remember correctly, I didn't begin the mess we were in. You did. The blame is on you." I wanted my words to sting. I wanted them to linger in her heart for as long as she had one, because that was what she did to me. 

"Alex-" She tried reaching for my hands. 

"No. I stopped trying. I wasn't enough for you." My words were not only hurting her, but they hurt me as well. 

"Do you ever wonder why? You blame me, but what about you? Look at the life that you live. You set out to hurt the people around you. You were the beginning of the end for us. While we were together, you did nothing but hurt me. You took a knife and stabbed me with it, and when you go the chance, you just kept twisting the knife. round and round." Noel spat as if her life depended on it. 

"Then leave."  I reached for a cigarette on the nightstand. How ironic. As the fire between us dimmed, I lit another one. I didn't even see her walk out the door. I only heard a loud slam.

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Dear readers, 

I'm super excited to start this, and it won't be a fanfic. I don't know how often I will update, but I want to upload new chapters more consistently. I'm not particularly sure If I will currently publish other books, but it all depends if you want to see more. 

I'm currently working on more chapters, so I hope you'll stick around <3,

Muah