The Talking Game

Chapter 1 and and Explanation

I approach the tree, take the knife, read the paper, and look through the bag.

This is what the paper says:

Hello, there, my abductee!

This paper was supposed to have some long, mysterious, cryptic message that you would have to spend hours thinking about to figure out the answer, but I couldn't think of anything that was cryptic enough and didn't sound completely dorky. So instead, I'll just tell you what you need to know. Firstly, there are several New York sized cities full of people that are relying on you to save your life. Secondly, if you want to do that, you ought to head north.

So was that mysterious enough for you? Yes? No? It's not, isn't it. Unless you can't figure out which direction is north. Then I guess it's kind of cryptic. No? yeah, you're right. it isn't.

Sincerely, your abductor.

This is what you find in the bag:

-a half empty water bottle

-a small pouch of beef jerky

-a Swiss Army Knife (one with all those insane tools that no one actually knows why they put them on there, since you're never gonna use 'em, except for the purpose of being able to say "oh yeah? well, I've got a spork on mine!")

-a notepad and a pencil (unfortunately not sharpened.)

As you finish digging through the bag, the crow - or raven, you're not entirely certain which - lets out a harsh cry, attracting your attention.

I pull out my knife then look up at the crow-or raven, I'm not entirely certain which.

The crow - or raven, you're not entirely certain which - lets out another screech, which sounds suspiciously like it's saying "What?" in a rather patronizing tone.

I take a step back. "What?" I say back to it, confused.

It screeches. Again. "What?"

"Ummm..." I wonder if the crow is talking or if I was just crazy, "What do you want?" I ask simultaneously shouldering the backpack, keeping my eyes on the crow - or raven, I'm not entirely certain which - the whole time.

It cocks it's head at you and blinks. "What I want-" you jump in surprise at it's gravelly voice, even though you were kind of expecting it, "- is for you to stop thinking of me as a crow - or raven, since you're not entirely certain which."

"O-okay," I stutter, confused, wondering how the heck it knew that, "then what are you?"

"I" it huffs, clearly annoyed with your ignorance, "am a phoenix."

"But you're black," I answer, "and not fire-y. I thought phoenixes were fire-birds."

It snorted again, clearly still irritated with your lack of intelligence. "You think that we're always fiery? Do you know how much of an inconvenience that would be, to burn down an entire forest every time we landed on a branch? I can tell you truthfully that there would not be a single forest left in the world."

"Oh." I say still confused and slightly disoriented. "Do you know which way is north?"

"Yes, obviously. I'm a phoenix. We always know which direction is north."

"Could you tell me which way is north? Because apparently I need to go north to save a ton of people. or so says my abductor. Who I don't actually know. Did you happen to see who put me here?"