Last year of elementary school. Lovely. Means I'm heading up to junior high next year. I hope I'm not the only one of my friends without a boyfriend. Nova got asked out a couple days ago by one of the guys in the grade below us. She turned him down.
"Rexelle, time to get ready for school," called Arielle. Arielle is my older sister, she's 13. "Dani, time to get up." Danielle is my younger sister, she's only 5 years old, so she is starting kindergarten today. I don't really know Dani that well but it'd be hard to know her as well as I know Arielle because she is so young.
So I sat up, and yawned, making Dani yawn too. We got up and I got an outfit for myself and Dani. Mom and Dad are both at work already so Arielle got us up, although I want to start getting up to an alarm. I made Dani and I breakfast and helped Arielle get out and catch the bus. I made some scrambled eggs and bacon. So Dani and I ate and I helped her get ready for school.
"I'm scared to go to school," she whined.
"It'll be okay," I comforted her, "You got me here if anyone bothers you. Okay?"
"Thank you Rexy," she said.
"Oh and to be entirely honest kindergarten doesn't really matter. I mean you will learn a few basic things but the internet can teach you that."
I could hear the bus down the street. "Time to go Dani!" I shouted. Before she could say anything I took her hand and dragged her outside to wait for the imminent arrival of the bus. The bus rolled up and the brakes squealed as the hunk of yellow metal came to a stop. The doors opened and I sat next to Dani as she doesn't have anyone else to sit with yet. Nova would understand. Nova is cool, she and I are very close friends. We know everything about each other, it's definitely early to be dating but we are definitely in love. Nova is just adorable with her almost lime green eyes, pink, soft lips. Her beautiful blonde hair, her smile. She definitely knows how to kiss, we've only ever kissed on the lips but I'm sure that will change in the next year. 5th grade is definitely what people would consider to be young but honestly I think if we can recognize being lesbians in 3rd grade then we are ready to date. Why am I thinking about this while sitting with my 5 year old sister? Why do I sit mesmerized by this? Girls don't do this do they? Isn't this a guy thing?
"Rexy?" she tried to grasp my attention, "Rexy, we are almost at school."
"Hmm?" I said drowsily.
"We are at school." She looked confused. "You okay?"
"Just daydreaming, I'm fine."
So we got off the bus and headed to the back field. We all hang out there until all the buses come in. I sent Dani off to tour the school with her class. Nova and I had a few minutes to ourselves which let us just have a quick hug and kiss. She ran her hand through my hair.
"You have beautiful hair Rexy, it's almost cinnamon colored," she said smiling.
"You're cute Nova." I smiled. She opened her arms and I fell into them. Hugging her was amazing. We are both battling depression, so it's tough, but we make it. Nova has been clean for a couple months, which is huge for her. She has had a lot of issues with self harm in the past year or two. I always try to help her but there isn't much I can do. She basically gets bullied for everything she does. It's hard to see. But she pulls through for me. She's okay. As for me, I don't get bullied that much but still considerably more than most people. I hope Nova is in my homeroom. I couldn't live without her. As to hear my last gasp of hope, I heard Nova was in the first homeroom, me in the last. They started doing them alphabetically now which means Cain will never be near Varela. In school Nova goes by Bianca, her middle name, simply because people constantly ask about her name. I just go by my full name Rexelle, but that's just because cute and my introvertedness don't quite get along. There's this guy in my homeroom that just moved here, Dillon Wade. He's kinda cute, black guys that can sing are something else for me. Wait. Wait. Why am I fantasizing about black guys? I'm a lesbian. Or am I? Fuck, I need to go the asylum or something. Is liking both genders a thing? Is being like both genders a thing? Is this just a fucked up dream? So I went on my phone during all the anti bullying presentations, about how they've eradicated bullying to which I call bullshit. I still get shit. Nova still gets shit. Fuck you school, fuck you. I wanted answers to my fucked up brain. Not stuff I know isn't true.
