Stringstrapped

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This poem is very personal to me so bear with me as you read the pain.

Song: "Distance" - Christina Perri

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Stringsnapped

I'm sorry that things ended this way
I never meant to hurt you
I saw this coming
I knew I had to stay
I never had this strong feeling before
I tried my best to work it out
I did whatever I could to protect you
Even if it cost my life
Even if it cause pain in my heart
I stayed to prevent harm for you
I made you happy
I made you laugh
I made you open up
I made you feel safe
But the last thing I ever wanted to do was make you cry
Things got crazy too fast
Confused and hurt, we gave it another chance
But we both knew it would soon come to an end
I couldn't stand to see you hurt anymore
I couldn't sleep, eat, talk, move and cried for a whole week
It kills me to see you in pain
It was my fault
I should've done all I could to stop it
I always knew you deserve better than my pain
You gave me your heart
I was scared to love again
Because the last time I gave my heart to someone, it never came back to me
No, I never played you or tried to trick you
I honestly did like you
Maybe our love was too soon
Maybe it was bad timing
Maybe it wasn't meant to be
I broke it off because I had to deal with my own life and I knew you deserved better
I know you were hurt
You heard lies from someone else
I tried telling you the truth of my feelings
I tried to make ends meet for one last good patch
You told me to leave already
That I should never come back
Right that moment, I felt like a string snapped from my heart
I never felt this way before
I had my heart broken a few times and it healed through time but what does it mean when my heartstring has been snapped?
I don't even know
I thought we could still be friends
But you wanted me gone
So I left
Faster than the wind
Like a ghost I became invisible
I hid in the shadows
So you wouldn't find me
You'll never hear from me ever again
I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy
I erased myself from your memory and heart
So you could move on and forget about me
I'll leave like we never met
So you can wake up like I was a dream
What hurts me the most is that you won't believe me, no matter what I said
You rather believe the lies from someone else
I guess you'll never hear the truth from my side
Because you'd be shattered too
I was crying and shaking in my sleep
I guess some stories don't last forever
I guess some endings aren't always happy
But I understand
I'll let you go
I'll keep my distance
But know this, I will always love you and protect you, even if it's from a distance
You wanted me gone, now I am

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