All hell was breaking loose in heaven.
An angel was flying to and fro, frantically talking to everyone, angel or human being, s/he met.
"It's that guy Steve Jobs," s/he said. "Ever since he found the computer room and started fooling around with the programs, we've had all sorts of problems. People are here who should not yet be here and there are people still down there on earth who should already be here."
"Why does God allow him to do that?" asked one recently-arrived computer scientist.
The angel looked at her with compassion, knowing that newcomers did not yet know the ways of heaven.
"God wants everyone to be happy," s/he said. "You can do whatever makes you happy here. This is heaven, after all."
"Ah," said the newcomer. "And Steve Jobs is happiest when he upgrades computer programs."
"But he doesn't know that we don't do apples here," said the angel. "We're doing pineapples!"
The newcomer did not get the joke. She did not know that angels were happiest when they were making jokes.
The angel went to the angel-on-duty or AOD at the gate.
"AOD," s/he said, "you've got someone named Frankie who's at the gate. He shouldn't be here yet."
The AOD sighed. "It's been bedlam all eternity," s/he said. "I'm running out of bodies to reincarnate the ones who shouldn't be here."
"What about Frankie?" asked the angel. God had apparently singled out Frankie among the thousands who had arrived that hour.
The AOD sighed again. "I made a terrible mistake. Or the computer made a terrible mistake. Frankie has been reincarnated, but not all of him. Only a part of him."
"That's not so bad," said the angel. "Why do you look so distressed?"
The AOD sighed again. "It's not that simple. Frankie returned to earth, but he returned not to a separate body but to a body that's already reincarnated."
The angel did not understand.
The AOD sighed again. "Frankie, or part of him anyway, is now merged into the body of one of the men he killed."
"Which part are you talking about?" asked the angel.
The AOD sighed again. "His SQ."
The angel nodded. S/he knew that, in heaven, SQ meant Sex Quotient. Of course, never having had sex, the angel did not really know what SQ meant.
Before going back to find Steve Jobs to make sure the guy did not cause any more trouble, the angel had to ask. "Whose body is Frankie in now?"
The AOD sighed again. "Father Romy's."
YOU ARE READING
Love After Heaven
RomanceA murder victim gets a chance to return to earth to meet his wife and her lover. He still loves his wife, despite her complicity in his murder. But he returns to earth not as himself but as a priest! How can he and his wife come together again? What...
