Her Darkhast

10th September 2026

Yes i deleted all the parts I don't know why but yes I deleted it i'm gonaa start again 

so let's not know about me let's just start from today how am i doing in my life today. You know when they say past don't matter let's be like that

so today is 10th september 2026, I started writing at 22:15 (10:15)pm.

so today i woke up at 8:31am to be exact i planned to wake up at 7am but being lazy i can't i got to college yes i'm in college. My classes were for 9 to 12 so i went to class where we started doing our work which was pattern. i did it then at 10am me and my friend took break like usually it's 10:30am like mam gives break at 10:30am but we most of the time take break at 10am like mam says take break anytime during the class but for only once and for 10-15 min so we went to cafe we ate then we were back to class doing work then again she came to class and said tomorrow we're going to have a display not for like proper things but just for feedback.  She handed me the responsibility to make sure things are ok i said yes but being Introvert like i can lead but it's like if anyone makes fun of my leadership its like an insecurity but i took it anyway so we are given different responsibilities and need to do everything so lets see how that goes after thet class ended then after we had to take some photographs for one project of hers so we did that.

After that me and my friend had already decided to stay coz we had to do the grp project of another subject i thought maybe we will finish it fast as we both were doing but it took time like i had already done my part but i was just helping her one more of friend was also there to do but she was not interested like she had made the drawing by her another friend of another group and wanted one more friend to do her painting we couldn't do anything it was her problem so we moved forward at 3pm we took a break to eat something as i hadn't had lunch after we came and again started at did it till 4:30 coz after that i didn't had patience to do that also in between we had changed class 4 times cox those class were having classes like taking all the things moving them so many times it was like ughhhhh so that i went for hostel and i called my mother to update her about everything also i hadn't had time to talk to her yesterday so yes 

i reached hostel stille talking to her changed and thank to god that my roommate was not there at that time coz it was already exhausting and can't really cope with her so after i changed i watched mobile a bit and happiness was for 10mins coz she came to room and i started watching ME BEFORE YOU and halfway i wanted to sleep so i slept i hadn't had a great sleepy night so i slept and obviouslymy roomate had to watch mobile that too on full sound like really so i put earphone put on music and slept at 5:31 then i woke up at what 6:23 i woke and found she was not at room so i assumed she had gone somewhere and its her bad habit that she doesn't lock the room like really also our room door is like little in bad condition so if you going just to fill water or take something that you'll come in few sec then you should leave the door open slightly ajar and if you're going for long time then just lock it otherwise it's stuck and it won't open so yes she didn't left it slightly ajar neither locked it so i had to locked it and also as she wasn't there so i off the lights too then slept but how can i sleep peacefully when she is there she came in as i sleep again she told why did you locked like really bro you didn't locked it if you had locked it then i didn't have to lock it so yaa then i couldn't sleep so i continued watching ME BEFORE YOU  and it was fabulous like i didn't expected the sad ending but still it was good and as she was there i went to bathroom to cry a little but just as i got from bed like she was so startled like she was working in her laptop and just an i got up she closed it and as i went to bathroom she like literally played bigg boss like really initially she wasn't watching bigg boss but suddenly she played but i left it thinking it's her privacy i came and continued watching also i had ordered some cheese balls so i ate it watching it then i after completing it i again cried a little in the washroom ofcouse then i hod to do some of my work like i literally had to messaged like 15 of my friends to submit their project so i can just get it oriented and print out and like some sent immediately and some send like about 9pm when i can't go out of hostel so it's ok i understand 

Then i did my project to submit it tomorrow so afetr that i talked to a person like he followed me on insta he msgd me so i thought ok i can talk to him as friends coz i believe love is only fictional that can be heard in stories real love i don't know so yes i talked to him actually i started talking 2-3 days back but he had msgd me so i replied and got to know that he is 28 and i'm not even fully 18 also he is from delhi a MBA whatever leave it then i thought i should write today's part and decided immediately that i should delete all the previous part coz i don't want anyone to know anything about me and also on previous days i was not open to my writing my emotions that openly so i deleted all the part and started writing this and now i'm writing this (22:58 / 10:58 now) 

my thoughts on ME BEFORE YOU (0n love too)

 it was emotional like when i went to washroom i was thinking like what if my life won't have a happy ending like this like i really believe in love like really but in real life it's very difficult to found like i'm fond of reading books but life is not like a book where someone will meet we suddenly that too like a millonaire or billionaire whatever he will be like obsessed with me no life doesn't happen like that i belive i will work hard to became millionaire bcoz i believe invest time to get money and invest money to save time like who said money can't buy happiness to live a peacful life where i can do whatever i want is life where i need money so that i can buy anything i want i don't have to think twice before buying it i don't to look at price tag to buy that so yes i want to earn money i want to be successful bothways in money part too and and in love part too. so yes i want to be successful cuz it's more important then me living 

also in movie i love how he noticed small details about her like the art of noticing things like really (i was distracted by insta for 5 mins, let's continue) so yes i love how he remembers things about her like really but i hope it had a happy ending like maybe if he had not took that decision maybe they would've been happy but i also think everything happens for a reason maybe i he didn't took that decisionmaybe he would be depressed by now or like maybe he was there in her life to let her be herself to tell her hoe love felt love is not when you're just running bcoz your boyfriend is runner even if she hates running or like remebering how much he ran in what time is more important that her birthday like really so yes that's all now

To Do List 

do skincare now                                                                                                                                                                       wake up at 6am tomorrow                                                                                                                                                wash your hair also shaving i need to shave i don't have razor so i'll just shave my face with face razor                                                                                                                                                                                             

That's all for today 

GST good night, sweet dream, take care 

bye love you all

also know a basic few things about me 

i'm an Aquarius born 2009 feb                                                                                                                                           right now i'm in college for designing