Imagine if, one day, you woke up from your usual sleep to find the world around you changed. What once made sense to you no longer does, behaviours you did before were questioned constantly, the things you said before were questioned constantly, everything about you questioned constantly. How would you feel? Confused? Upset? Overwhelmed? Excluded? Now imagine that is how your entire life has felt this way, day to day of these negative feelings but being told "But you don't act like you feel that way? I've met people like that before and you are different from them."
I was diagnosed with autism recently, 3rd August 2026. This doesn't mean I suddenly became autistic because of this piece of paper. So why do people act like I was not autistic before? I sat in my bedroom, confused as to why I did not feel happy to have that piece of paper to confirm the reason as to why I am like this, to confirm that there is something 'wrong' with me. I need to tell my life story, to share what I have been through up until this moment and process my feelings in a way that other may either let a reader feel seen or for someone to maybe understand a person they know who has autism. Therefore, I would like to warn you this has themes of family struggles, bullying, suicide, sexual assault and the deep emotion that was masked.
If you struggle, no matter how small or large you may believe it to be, please reach out to a loved one, your doctor or mental health services near you.
YOU ARE READING
My Trauma, My Autism
Non-FictionThis is a short story to process my recent autism diagnosis as a 24 year old woman, in hopes I can accept myself for who I am. I hope to potentially allow others to not feel like an alien or support someone who is trying to understand others.
