The Pain Of It All

[Author's note: For Aik, Happy Birthday! This short story is special to me and I wanted for you to cry on your birthday because I'm naughty Hahahahah!]

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This short story was originally published in the short-story collection I've Felt It: Stories and Various Writings.

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My eyes tracing the fireflies of the night made me think on how I too could have the taste of freedom if only I had wings but it was never meant to be that and I couldn't help but notice my companion holding one firefly in his white gloved hands saying how beautiful her memory is, her mind, her colors, her presence. I just watched him and saw his eyes closed. He got up and walked away, sheltering the firefly, mumbling along the way.

I sigh and I watch the crescent moon sleep in the night till my eyes close. Hoping how one day how I could kill myself.

***

I opened my eyes and looked at my companion. "How long were you here?"

He didn't answer for a moment and said: "Years. 1999 if I remember correctly. These days sometimes feel like a blur."

"How many years?" I said, bewildered.

"I don't know anymore. Maybe 5? 6?"

I lowered my head on my hands.

"You'll get the hang of it."

I shake my head. "Why is this happening? What am I even?" I looked at my smooth yet wooden body and saw metal where my joints should be. "Why do I feel like this?"

"There's no need to fret about it. Afterall, you're still in one piece. Things like these just happen."

"It's not... normal."

"But to us, it is."

I shook my head, stood up and left, heading for the bedroom I was assigned into.

***

One of those days again.

Today we are out in the field, tasked to explore an abandoned mine and find the hidden treasure chest somewhere along the tunnels filled with god knows what (he wouldn't tell us anyway, that's the surprise).

We decided to split up and I ventured forth with my lantern to one of the tunnels that had train tracks. There was no light but mine only. Sometimes I couldn't stand to be with him. His giant eyes sometimes unnerve me and I still couldn't get used to it, especially when he is staring at the dark, during his down days. I'm surprised he is still alive, let alone being the remaining survivor left. Then again, I feel bad for him but sometimes, I just need to be alone by myself, couldn't handle the noise of it all, especially the other twat screaming every time like a nutcase gone loose, all giddy like a kid then being a terrible boss among other things. His sidekick meanwhile keeps cracking jokes like it was nothing and it just causes uneasiness like all of this is normal and fun. What does "fun" even mean to them? It's better to cooperate than risk losing it all. Keep things going and not cause too much trouble.

"Checkers!" a voice said from far away in front of me in the dark, making me gasp and drop my lantern. I picked it up and saw huge eyes staring at me, bloodshot even. I just stare at it back, breathing fast. "I found the treasure. It's near that tunnel." he points behind him with his white gloves, towards the one tunnel with wooden beams on top.

"You startled me!" I said. "You should give a warning next time."

"I saw your light. Mine was lost down further. I just saw a creature taking it even. I thought it best to find you and stick together."