Alternative Tactics

Ch. 5: Oh Shit, Something is Wrong With The Crowd

Chapter 5: Oh Shit, Something is Wrong With The Crowd

When I awoke in his arms, I was disoriented. Maybe it was the thin leather seat beneath me. Us. Perhaps it was my fingers, interlaced with his and clutched tightly. We were both holding each other's hands as if we'd never let go. As if we never wanted to let go. As if we needed the other one. But we didn't. We were both strong, independent people. I managed to sit up, keeping my fingers tight in his. From the window I could see how the snow had powdered everything with a dusting of white. The sun was just rising, illuminating the snow to make it shimmer and stretching shadows in a way that dark met light in a perfect balance. 

I needed to stop doing stuff like this. Swearing I wanted nothing to do with him, that I would stay away from him and then falling asleep next to him. It was pathetic. I knew I wanted to be close to him and once again my heart begged the question of whether or not it was worth it to keep up with what I'd been saying about not dating him because of what had happened. Before I could think about it or anything else, Cyric woke up. "Hey," He muttered, about to rub sleep out of his eyes when he realized we were still holding hands. There was a moment of complete awkwardness and then I pulled my hand away from his, knowing I was blushing furiously. We looked away from each other and Cyric rubbed sleep out of his eyes.

"How'd you sleep?" I asked, not wanting to let the silence stretch on for too long.

"Fine, how'd you sleep?" He asked, his tone implied that there was more to his question but I had no idea what he was talking about.

"Um, okay?" I said, unsure of what else to say.

"You don't remember last night, do you?" Cyric asked. I frowned at him.

"No," I said, verbalizing my confusion in the one word. He shrugged as much as he could lying down and then tried to get up. After a little bit of shuffling, we were both sitting in the back seat and than immediately getting out to pull out food. Except, apparently I didn't want food because I dropped like a dead weight to my knees and started coughing and vomiting blood, my hands planted on the cold ground and my whole body shaking as blood flew from my mouth, more blood than could be healthy. Splattering, the white powder that dusted the ground. Cyric was next to me in an instant. It burned like acid on the way up. Cyric put his arm over my back, I could feel him behind me, holding me as I coughed and my hair out of my face as sticky blood splattered the ground. The blood became sludgier and in my veins I could feel it thickening, scarily so. I started crying as well, in fear. My heart started to slow, I could feel it slowing. Was I dying? Then I stopped coughing. My heartbeat was slow but steady, not gone yet. It was all I could do to lean backward's into Cyric's embrace. He mumbled words of comfort but I knew he was freaking out. Eventually, I started to hear the words and comprehend them. "I'm okay," I whispered weakly, forcing the words out. Cyric didn't buy it. 

"I'm sure you are, because collapsing totally counts as being fine," He replied. I bit back my own retort and attempted to use his shoulder to help me up but my legs were too weak and I couldn't even support my own weight. Cyric put me in the back seat, despite my protests. 

"Ass," I muttered, I felt drowsy, as if all the convulsing had made me tired. 

"You'll thank me later," Cyric replied and he got into the front seat, the food forgotten as he closed the car door. With anyone else I might've felt threatened, I was falling asleep against my will in a car, while someone drove away, but I still felt safe with Cyric here and I let myself fall into a listless sleep. 

~*~

The building was on fire. There I sat, watching it all, horrified with what I'd done. We all watched as it crumbled, a girl's screaming still heard inside. The man was in there too, but he didn't scream. They deserved it, I guess, but I still felt bad about having done it. As I soon found out, the screaming wasn't the worst part. It was when the screaming stopped that the emotions crashed over me with enough force to bring me to my knees. When the screaming stopped, I'd realized what I'd done. I'd killed someone.