heartbreak, trust issues, come back here, i miss you

Chapter One.

A movie, long forgotten, played in the background, illuminating the dark bedroom up with small flashes of light.

Murmurs from the actors onscreen overlapped with the duo's idle chatting, giving their words a feeling of taboo privacy.

Fire Ring's eyes weren't on the screen, no, he was gazing at Broken Spawn, who was giggling at a dumb joke he'd made, cheeks flushed, leaning onto Fire Ring's shoulder.

Spawn was always like this when it was late or when he was tired; more affectionate, more touchy, with less of a filter. It was adorable, endearing, really. It made Fire Ring's heart feel a way that it really shouldn't. They were friends, no more, no less.

...

His brain, his heart, just wouldn't listen to him. It never did.

Fire Ring's mind was brought back to the present as Broken Spawn buried his face against Fire Ring's neck, huffing, wrapping an arm around him. And fuck if Fire Ring's heart didn't accelerate in speed, an indicator to his growing feelings that he was all too aware of.

Fuck.

Fire Ring couldn't do this. Couldn't love Broken Spawn, couldn't be the lover that everyone thought he could. He was brash, impulsive, and just not healthy for anyone in general.

A small huff came from Spawn's mouth, and when Fire Ring looked down at him, he realized he was already falling asleep.

Damn it, he wasn't healthy for anyone, much less someone as soft, as innocent as Spawn.

He would hurt him. That'd be all he'd ever do, and he'd never be good enough.

Fire Ring would never really deserve him. Hell, no one would ever deserve him, no one would ever be good enough for Broken Spawn, an angel reincarnated into a human body.

He couldn't do this, he would never be able to do this.

So he pried Spawn's arms off him, tucking the blankets around him. He paused at the doorway, glancing back at him one last time, before leaving, the front door closing behind him acting as a final barrier between him and the one who meant everything to him.

The one who meant so much, too much to Fire Ring.

It was time he let him go, before it was too late. Before Spawn got hurt.

The sound of Fire Ring's footsteps on the sidewalk, quiet yet loud in the silent night, sounded final.

Because it was.

Because it had to be.

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Broken Spawn was insistent, Fire Ring'd give him that.

He tried again, and again, to talk to Fire Ring, until it'd gotten to be too much. Until Fire Ring's heart begged him to comfort him, to take him back. To reassure him that Fire Ring'd never leave him ever, never wanted to be around anyone else but him, that he loved him.

And he couldn't, despite how much he wanted to.

Fire Ring hadn't meant to push Spawn, hadn't meant for the jarring words to leave his mouth.

He'd panicked. It hurt so bad to see Spawn stumble back, trip, land with a pained cry. But it served his purpose, that was for sure. Broken Spawn's eyes had filled with a fear that hurt Fire Ring to see, and he'd scrambled back, wincing in pain, swallowing as Fire Ring's betrayal truly hit him.

God, I'm so sorry, Spawn.

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