The Difference || Zenitsu angst!!

The Difference~

The difference between you and I...

There's too many to count, actually. You're smart, brave, beautiful, strong, and capable..

Hah.. You're worth everything.. Every dollar, every laugh, every life, every joyous day where you and I train under the heats of the sun. You're so.. so good.

Why must you be so god damn perfect, dammit?! Why must you have so much ahead of you that only I can only dream of..?

You're something.

And I, my dearest, friend, I'm not even worth the smallest of all dollars. I will only rot and suffer till the end of time.

Time. Time is such a simple thing but so complex at the same time. It takes, and it takes till we're on our last weary limb, but in the end, it rewards. Why is that? Well, I don't really know, to be honest.

It's only a matter of time till you ditch me. You'll realize how stupid, craven, ugly, weak, incompetent. God! Why am I like this! I'm so immature, wasted, dumb, inept, incapable, selfish...

That's what I am... I am, and only be immature, wasted, dumb, inept, incapable, selfish, sinful, vulgar, waste of space, nothing-

Nothing. That's exactly what I am. That's the difference. The difference between you and I.

Tanjiro.

You're something. I'm nothing.

...

The arms that are cold and weak - my arms... - they hold me. Console me as I cry into my pillow. Though, they don't give much comfort, for they are nothing compared to their arms.

Even if they felt so harsh, so mean, so cruel. I crave for them every day. I feel so helpless. I am helpless.

That's a way to describe me. Helpless. A helpless, nobody. That's me.

Just to see their faces again. To feel them console me in their arms even! Dammit! I keep drowning in these unwanted memories.

They used me for heaven's sake! And yet... I crave and crave. I just want someone to hold me. To tell me it's going to be okay, even if it's far from being okay.

How did I end up like this..? So... wasted. That's until I feel-

her hands touch, pull, squeeze, pinch, and caress my arms. Her fingers tip toe down my arm. Feeling every useless bit of it.

The sounds coming from my mouth - soft giggles - don't seem to stop, but she doesn't seem to mind it. If anything, she was chuckling. I made her laugh, something so rare now in days.

I feel my face heat up as her index finger caresses my chest. "Zenitsu...~ You're such a furry with emotions, aren't you?"

I nod stiffly, my words stuck in my throat like a clog.

"Do they make you feel different?~" She asks, her voice different. A bit deeper. More smooth, like some kind of sweet nectar.

She pushes me against the wall behind us both, her hands trapping me under her. It feels so hot. The atmosphere is so different now. It was just so sweet, so light. Now, it's so heated, so different...

Her breath is mixing with my own, and I'm just able to choke out a response, "S-Sometimes...!" My voice sounded so squeaky and quiet compared to hers.

"I'm going to show you how different they can feel~" She smirks, sliding her hands to my shoulders.

"H-Huh? What do you mean..?"

"How sheltered are you?" She mutters, her hands sliding down my chest now. Her skilled fingers untying my obi with haste.