Sweetest Sin

Chapter 1 | Sweetest Sin

Chapter One

1427 Pine Valley

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I used to think grief would come as a wave. Crash in, knock you on your ass, then pull back out. But sometimes it just lingers like smoke, clinging to your clothes, wrapping around your skin, filling your lungs. It follows you home and makes a bed beside you. Somewhere in the haze, you start thinking maybe this is just how it is now. Amor fati, I read that somewhere once. Love your fate, even the parts that hurt. Especially those.

"You weren't supposed to leave me," I whispered. "You promised you'd get better."

The leaves by the old oak were turning orange and gold. I always loved autumn, but maybe tomorrow I'd hate it. 'Cause now it was the season I lost my mama. And I kept wondering—what if today hadn't happened?

I was seventeen, a stack of homework piling up on my desk, bills slipping through my fingers. No dad to call, no brothers or sisters to lean on. And now she was gone too.

"It ain't supposed to end like this," a man said behind me. "She still had so much in her."

Mama was gone. That's what the nurse told me yesterday, handing over a small box with her things. Just a few pieces... her old necklace from late grandma, a photo, and a letter. My hands shook as I unfolded it.

It was addressed to me.

It said, Elias Kane, 1427 Pine Valley, is your daddy.

I didn't know what to make of it. I barely knew my mama at all. She was lost in pills or whatever else she could get her hands on. I couldn't save her. Most nights she didn't come home, and the ones she did, we were strangers passing under the same roof. Now out of nowhere, there was this man, a complete stranger who was supposed to be my dad.

Mrs. Callahan from next door touched my shoulder. "Gracie, baby, we here for you," she said. Her eyes were soft, and I looked away before mine started spilling.

Maya and Jonah stayed a little behind, their faces full with worry. They've been my best friends since forever. The only ones who knew what it meant when Mama drank, when the yelling turned into slaps, when I showed up to school with bruises and had to lie about how it happened.

Jonah cleared his throat, voice rough. "Gracie, we're here for you. You don't gotta carry it all by yourself."

Rain slid down my face, blending with tears I didn't fight back. Each drop soaked through my jacket, chilling me to the bone. The letters carved deep in stone: Claire Rae Stoney. I could almost feel all the things she never got to do, the lullabies she never sang, the arms that never held me tight enough to make the world right. The fight she lost, running from the pain that chased her until it caught her.

The rain came harder, pounding the umbrella I didn't bother holding. Folks behind me whispered prayers, shared stories, said she had a good heart, tried her best.

Maya touched my arm. "Gracie, come on. Let's get you home."

"I'm not ready to leave her yet," I said.

Jonah stepped closer. "She wouldn't want you standin' out here catchin' pneumonia. You know that."

I took a last breath of the cold fall air, feelin' it settle in, and finally let 'em pull me away from that grave.

Jonah fired up the engine, warmth spilling into the tight space. The door shut behind me, and the oak above shook loose wet leaves and tiny drops. The car rolled off, and the grave disappeared into the gray mist and rain that wouldn't forget her.