Diary! ^_^

12/11/25

I just wished I was never baptized though.

At least then I wouldn't feel guilty for leaving that religion..

Funny, I used to be religious.

Y'know, I used to want to be one of God's children. But time passed and I lost that shine. Because if I'm being honest? Everything happened to me.

I was abused

I got too attached

I push people away

I moved into another place

I moved into another country

I got neglected by my family

I had a friend, they never really stayed

I had a friend, I accidentally pushed them away

I was.. used.

I then want to be used once more.

I'm a girl

I'm a boy

I'm nonbinary

I'm gender neutral

I wanted to die

I wanted to live

I used a blade

I felt miserable

I felt manic

I used to get good grades

I have the worst grades

I was told I'm smart

I was told I'm stupid

I stole

I got stolen from

And now I just feel numb at times until my bpd hits "manic" mode.

I'm depressed and I stare at the sky, I wanted to jump off from a building.

If I love someone I actually love I might do it, I might succeed.

BUT DAMN IT IF I DIED WHAT WOULD MY MOM THINK? WHAT WOULD MY SISTER THINK? WHAT WOULD MY LOVER THINK?

I'm a failure and now I'm stuck.

I miss Loretta. I miss them. I'm sorry for hurting you.

7: 28 AM

🔥🔥🔥GOOD 🔥🔥🔥🔥M🔥RNING 🔥🔥🔥EVERY🔥NE 🔥🔥🔥RISE N GRIND🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

I just realized I mostly get up at around 30

Wow

Anyways IT'S DAMN COLD IN THIS PLACE BRO

I think silly little ol' me is gonna need a lot more heat...

I was about to say something freaky JOKINGLY

I thought about the possible meals I could eat today and I'm like hungry so I just got up like I'm a responsible, good, mentally healthy kid which is ironic.

I think I'm hungry guys... ahhhh fresh meat type shi...

Wait that's not actually wrong.

Dei sey my hngers a problm...

Dei tll mi to curb my apetit

I'm not okay 🙏🙏🙏🤣🤣🤣

Whoops wrong emoji 💜

Where's the gamble emoji

Oh wait I found it 🐒

SHIT MISCKICK