“If everybody minded their own business, the world would go around a great deal faster than it does.” Lewis Carrol, Alice in Wonderland
Before going to the group session, Alice stood out in the garden. On the back wall of her garden she'd placed a focal point, a cement panel hung above a pot which stood on stepping stone sthat radiated out in a semi-circle. She'd done it by herself the day her divorce had gone through. She had dug a hole while the children were at school and buried all her mementoes from her relationship with Jack in it. On the underside of the central stone she had written "Here lies the remains of Alice and Jack's marriage. May it rest in peace."
It was a shrine - a monument to what had once been.
But the dead relationship had never rested quite peacefully, because Jack would not go away. Alice honestly did not know if she wanted him to. Since the divorce they seemed to get along so much better, until she remembered...like she did this morning. Every time she rememebered she came out here to rebury the ghost of what had been. Every time she came out here to bury her anger and her tears.
"Mom, arent you going to be late?" Danielle was hanging from her bedroom window - careless of her shirt hooking on the window sill.
"For what, poppet?" she asked innocently. trying not to betray too much emotion in her voice. She did not want her children to know how much she wanted their father not to be a part of her life.
Danielle rolled her eyes. "You said you're going to a meeting tonight. I saw that pamphlet - the support group meets every Tuesday at six-thirty."
Alice sometimes forgot that Danielle was nine and as curious as a cat and far too big for her shoes. Since the divorce she seemed to think that she was the mother and Alice the child. It irritated Alice and she grumbled as she stalked into the house.
"You should learn to mind your own business sweetheart."
"You are my business, mom." Danielle sang out as she slid back into her room to finish her home work.
*
"...So I spent the whole day in a bad mood and craving a bloody cigarette just because Sally wouldn't mind her own business." Alice concluded telling the rest of the group of her little indiscrepancy. She felt good after tellling it to people she was sure would understand.
She looked around at their faces, and felt her glib smile slip from her face. They were all looking at her like she was completely mental. The councellor cleared her throat, breaking the almost incredulous silence that beat like a living thing in the room.
"Alice, our friends tend to only get involoved in our business, especially if it is concerning something that is bad for us, because they care. Dan," she looked at Mr Liverpool. "Would you want your family minding their own business if you try to shoot up again?"
Mr. Liverpool shook his head. "It's them that keeps me grounded, who remind me why I am trying to get clean and break my addiction in the first place. If they didn't mind my business I would have been back to trippin' daily long ago."
Alice was staring at him. She had not expected such an admission from him. He looked so macho, so "screw the rest of the world" and "mind your own business" like. She shrugged. Looks were definitely deceiving.
"You need to find out why Jack has such a hold on you. Why do you crave his attention, even after the divorce?" mr Liverpool's eyes were on hers: intense. It felt like he was looking right into her trecherous heart.
Frowning, a little perplexed Alice wondered, why indeed?
Later that night she lay in bed still pondering abou this and not liking what her heart was telling her. Her head hurt. Her heart hurt and she was doomed to a night of insomnia.
She wished Mr Liverpool had minded his own business.
