When Diamond asked me to be her Maid of Honor, I wasn't shocked at all. I've known since I was seven, when my sister planned her wedding for the first time. Even now, I can picture my and my sisters' names written in pink, glittery ink, and our roles described beneath it.
I would be in charge of making sure everything Diamond dreamed of having on her wedding day would become a reality. Or in other words, I would be the free event planner, in charge of the vendors and bands and all that jazz. If the girl wished for dancing unicorns, I would find a way to get her those damn unicorns.
Emerald would be the 'bodyguard' — the scary right-hand woman that the vendors and bands would be terrified to say no to. It's a role that should come as second nature to her since she's already a bitch every other day of the year.
And Amethyst would be the fun one. She would make sure everyone was happy and relaxed, and would force us to take time to actually celebrate the occasion. It is the event of the century, after all.
Opal wasn't alive then, but if she's now in charge of taking on Amethyst's role, then I fear we are all screwed. Nothing is happy or relaxed about her bratty ass these days.
The book is exactly how I remembered it. It was the first thing Diamond did the morning after the engagement party — pull it out of storage and force us all to read it again. Its pages are now wrinkled and covered in dust, but other than that, it's the same.
Same magazine cutouts of dress inspiration. Same list of songs for potential first dances. Same pictures of men on a page labelled Future Grooms? — one of whom being from an old Victory Tour poster of Palladium Barker.
I tease her about it for about two seconds before she sends me a glare that promptly shuts me up. Then, we get to work. I thought that since Diamond's wedding is something that has been in the works for about fifteen years now, planning it would be easy.
I was wrong.
Horrifically wrong.
The moment Augustus put that ring on my sister's finger, Diamond has been the most terrifying woman I know. Even Emerald flinches when she speaks now. Emerald, the sister who sends us all death threats on the daily, now panics whenever Diamond mentions the words color scheme.
Which still hasn't been decided, by the way!
First, Diamond's heart was set on pink pastels. Then, she thought green was the right choice since it would make her eyes pop. AND THEN, Auggie had to open his damn mouth after I ordered my sage green bridesmaid dress and say that he really likes the color blue.
SO EVERYTHING HAD TO CHANGE!
She went from baby blue to sky blue. Navy blue, then sapphire blue, which was flattering for a brief moment, but then Diamond said it's the ugliest color to ever exist. Rude. Then we looked at cornflower blue, azure blue, cerulean blue, and about fifty other shades of blue that I don't know the names of!
The color blue now gives me a headache, but luckily (INFURIATINGLY) Diamond no longer wants blue in her wedding. As of now, a new color scheme has yet to be decided.
And don't get me started on the seating arrangements.
Diamond insists on inviting every single person that she's ever met to the wedding. This includes old classmates, the other victors, teachers, extended family, and as of last Tuesday, a woman she met in the bakery (who requested that her husband and children receive an invite as well, of course).
And since I am the one in charge of seating arrangements, I have to know every single person's opinions of the other guests at the wedding. I've given Diamond five different arrangement options already, but no, Auggie's uncle can't sit too close to the bar because he is four months sober. My mother's cousin's family can't sit too close to the gifts table because the son is apparently a klepto. And my personal favorite, the MacGuires can't sit next to the DiAngelos because one of the fathers is having an affair with the barely legal daughter of the other family.
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