ᴅᴇᴀʀᴇsᴛ ᴠɪᴏʟᴇᴛ [a warriors fanfiction]

11.

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❛ I want neither the sweetness of honey
nor the sting of the bees ❜
- Sappho (Sappho: Poems & Fragments transl. Josephine Balmer)
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✴︎

   Palefalcon spoke suddenly, in a mild tone that the less-experienced might mistake as casual. "Do you like that Pebblepaw?"

   Rosemarypaw nearly choked on her mouthful of sparrow. She swallowed it down painfully, eyeing her mother through the dusky evening light that settled over PlumeClan camp. The two of them had been eating in companionable silence up until that moment. Why now?! she thought. Struggling to keep her tone neutral, she meowed, "Why do you ask?"

   "Don't answer my question with another question, child," Palefalcon replied sharply. Her hazel eyes were unflinching. "Though I suppose that's answer enough."

   If Rosemarypaw wasn't already frigid, she would have surely broken out into a cold sweat. As it was, the two of them sat between piles of snow; the stone floor of the clearing was cold as ice even after being cleared. Although their pelts were thick, their paw-pads had no such protection. She shuffled her paws as if to warm them up, avoiding her mother's gaze.

   Palefalcon watched Rosemarypaw fidget. "I never really wanted a mate either," she admitted in a much softer tone. She curled her feathery light grey tail neatly around cream paws.

   That made Rosemarypaw look up. "You didn't...?"

   "No." The older she-cat closed her eyes wistfully. A breeze ruffled the tufts on her ears. "I always just wanted to be a warrior. To focus solely on those responsibilities and then die with honor. Not raise a family."

   Rosemarypaw's chest tightened unbearably. She couldn't quite place why hearing this made her so sad. "But... something changed?"

   "My brother, my only littermate, died without any offspring," Palefalcon meowed. She opened her eyes and fixed Rosemarypaw with a knowing stare. "It became my responsibility to continue our bloodline. And now, that falls to you, Rosemarypaw. But once it's done with, you can go back to your normal life as a warrior."

   Of course, thought Rosemarypaw. She sighed inwardly. Of course that's the message she took away. And no mention of Rosemarypaw's sister. It was as if she barely existed. Nobody expected Fennelpaw to do something so noble as continue their lineage, so naturally it fell on Rosemarypaw to bear the weight all by herself. Nothing new.

   Perhaps because she was so frustrated, and definitely because she was foolish, she couldn't hold back her words any longer. "I don't like him!" she burst out, a little louder than she intended. Her half-eaten sparrow lay forgotten on the ground. "I don't intend on being with him, and I mean it."