The Red String Between Us Part II: Frayed Threads

第22章 Conflicted hearts & Anticipation

      The next morning, I sank into my couch with a cup of green tea, the white orchids still perched elegantly on the counter, their delicate petals catching the soft glow of the lamp. My phone was already in my hand before I even realized it—I needed to hear a familiar voice, someone who could help me sort through the storm in my chest.

"Claire," I said as soon as she picked up, my voice trembling slightly. "You're not going to believe what happened last night."

"Tell me everything," Claire replied immediately, the excitement in her voice like a spark.

I laughed nervously. "So... Kenji. He left flowers. White orchids. And a card. And... and he wants me to come to Hokkaido tomorrow night at seven. He... he's planned something for my birthday."

There was a pause on the other end, and then Claire's tone softened. "Eden... that's incredible! You two decided to slow things down, but it sounds like he's thinking about you—really thinking. You should enjoy it. Embrace it. Don't overthink it."

I closed my eyes, leaning back against the couch, the weight of my mixed emotions pressing down. "I know... I just... I can't stop thinking about Harum too. I mean, he's been so kind and attentive, I feel something for him... but it feels wrong to entertain him if im also going to keep this fling with Kenji" I replied. 

Claire's voice was gentle but firm. "Then don't pretend, Eden. Your heart knows what it wants. Harum's sweet, yes, but you don't owe anyone more than your honesty—with them and with yourself. If your feelings are for Kenji, let yourself feel it fully."

I exhaled slowly, guilt and longing twining in my chest. "I just... I hate that I've been giving Harum attention, while trying to figure out what it is I have with Kenji. I can't shake the thought that I might be leading him on, even unintentionally."

"You're not a villain, Eden," Claire reassured me. "You're human. Feel what you feel. Be honest. And tonight, let yourself feel what Kenji has planned. Take the moment for yourself. It's your birthday—your life."

I nodded silently, gripping my phone a little tighter. The orchids seemed to catch the lamp light, glowing as if mirroring the mix of hope and fear coiled inside me. I remembered my mom's words about embracing love, about being brave enough to follow your heart. And yet... I couldn't help but wonder if saying yes to Kenji was a mistake, as much as I wanted to do anything with him. Even for a fleeting moment, I loved being in his presence—the way he made the world feel sharper, warmer, and impossibly alive.

Tonight would be a turning point. And for the first time in weeks, I allowed myself to imagine what it might feel like to truly let Kenji in, even just for a moment. I wondered if I was confusing him or were we both just crossing each others boundaries. 

      The afternoon passed in a haze of nervous energy. I kept glancing at the clock, my mind spinning with possibilities of what Kenji might have planned. Every notification on my phone made my heart jump, half-expecting a last-minute change or a clue.

By early evening, I finally began to get ready. I stood in front of my closet, weighing options carefully. Nothing too formal, but nothing casual either. Something that felt like me—polished, confident, but still approachable.

I settled on a sleek, deep emerald dress that hugged my frame in just the right places. The color made my eyes pop and felt daring enough for a night shrouded in mystery. I brushed my hair into loose waves, letting a few strands frame my face, then added subtle earrings that sparkled in the soft light. A touch of bold lipstick, and I was ready—or as ready as I'd ever be when the anticipation was gnawing at every nerve.

I glanced at the orchids Kenji had sent again. Their pristine white petals seemed almost to pulse with promise, and I felt a thrill I hadn't experienced in months. My mind drifted to last night's conversation with Claire—embrace it, Eden. Feel what you feel. I drew a deep breath, trying to steady the flutter in my chest.

The clock edged closer to seven. My phone buzzed, and I saw his name on the screen. My pulse quickened as I read the text.

"Are you ready?" Kenji's asked. 

"I... I think so," I replied, a soft laugh escaping me. "I'm just... curious. Where are we going?"

"Curiosity is part of the adventure," he said, his tone teasing but not revealing a thing. "I'm picking you up in twenty minutes." I was excited, he had always picked me up, or had his security drive us around. I appreciated their protection and discretion but being with Kenji alone is something I don't experience often due to both of our busy schedule and company conflict. 

Twenty minutes. That was all I had to brace myself for the unknown—Kenji's carefully planned night, the weight of what I felt for him, and the nervous thrill of stepping into whatever he had waiting.

I checked my reflection one last time. Emerald dress, waves falling just so, confidence stitched over nerves. I grabbed my clutch, took a steadying breath, and headed to the door, anticipation threading every step. Tonight wasn't just another evening—it was the night that could tip everything, the night I had to decide what my heart was truly ready to embrace.