Invisble string || Charles Leclerc (On hold)

xiv - static build up

Olivia

3 months ago... (December 2022)

He is different than I imagined. Sometimes he gets in his head. And it is near impossible to get him. Sometimes, when I'm in the wrong, it's scary. He turns into this person I had never imagined to be. It reminds me of my father and it scares me.

"Hey. Where did you go?" He was sitting across from me. And even in the dim light of the restraunt and his shaggy hair and the bags under his eyes, he was gorgeous. Like an angel. "Nowhere." I said and I could not see the fight last night. I felt it everytime I moved. "Look." I knew he was going to bring it up. I couldn't do anything but listen.

"I know you've been busy. But I feel like I used to see you more before we were dating. And I know, I fucked up last night. It'll never happen again. I promise." He said and I smiled at the apology, maybe we could leave it here and move on. "But you need to understand my side too. I barely see my girlfriend anymore and when I do, you've seen the things they say." I reached around, lacing my fingers through his. "I know. Look, it's just, I need to put this album out before the second leg of the tour and there is so much that isn't done." He looked up at me and there was anger in his eyes again.

"Why is it always about you, Olivia?" He said and his fingers were squeezing mine. "Jake, I didn't mean that." I tried to pull my hand back but he didn't let me. "It is always about you isn't it? The pop princess. The next Taylor Swift." He let go of me but the same viciousness from last night was back. "Who cares that your boyfriend, who has the same job by the way, is at home, waiting for his girlfriend, who can't even leave him a message." Jake never once took his eyes off me and I was scared to go to his apartment with him.

I couldn't even get a word out before he was leaving the restraunt. I was stuck. Leaving the restraunt meant following him home. Where there was nothing standing in the way of a repeat of last night. "Anything else?" The server asked me as she smiled at me. "Just the check." I could barely breath. And she noticed cause the check had a piece of paper in the folder as well.

It's okay to leave.

I didn't know what to say. I left a tip of whatever change was there. I left the bill, but I did take the little sheet of paper with her simple scrawling handwriting. I tuck it deep enough in my back pocket, hoping he doesn't find it.

It is weird when love turns into fear. You can never see it coming. You never even think of it until the first strike. It's like the static build up of a storm. And from then on, you can feel nothing but the fear. Just like the lightening that follows. There are moments of overwhelming love. The quite moments in bed with my bruised body and his whispered apologies. In those quite moments I am filled with love. But I feel fear in every vein of my body when his fills with anger. I am afraid of the man I loved for 3 years.

I can hear zara in the back of my mind. Telling me I should leave him. But I need to give him a chance. Everyone makes mistakes. He just slipped once.