Just A Notion

Chapter 7: The Empty Studio

     She had never used it before, whenever she felt like visiting her, she´d knock, listening to the footsteps of Frida slowly walking towards the door, excited seeing her again. She someday had forgotten she even had a key to her home, since she had never used it anyway.

But this time, going through lots of past situations and memories, she remembered putting the key into this tiny pocket of her coat, and after weeks of not remembering it was even there, she pulled it out as if she knew it had been there the whole time.

     Agnetha hesitated for just a moment before unlocking the door and stepping inside. The apartment was dark, eerily quiet. A faint draft of cold air met her as she entered, and she immediately noticed the emptiness. The usual touches of life—Frida’s jacket by the door, the faint sound of music playing, the scent of coffee in the air—were all missing.

     “Frida?” Agnetha called softly, her voice shaking. She walked further in, her eyes scanning the room. She knew something was off.

     That’s when she saw it.

A small, neatly folded letter sat on the coffee table, her name written on the front in Frida’s elegant handwriting. Agnetha froze, her breath catching in her throat. For a moment, she couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. The letter felt like a warning, a goodbye.

     “No…” she whispered. She stepped forward slowly, as if afraid the letter might disappear, and picked it up with trembling hands.

     She sank onto the sofa, unfolding the paper carefully. Agnetha held the paper close, noticing the scent of Frida´s perfume, the last bit of Frida in these rooms. Her heart pounded in her chest as her eyes scanned the words.

My dearest Agnetha,

By the time you read this, I will be gone.

I couldn’t tell you in person because

I knew you’d try to stop me,

and I don’t have the strength to
say goodbye to your face.

I can’t stay here anymore.

Everything that’s happened— it’s too much.

I hurt Benny, I hurt the group,
and I can’t bear the thought of
hurting you, too.
I love you more than I’ve ever
loved anyone, but that love has come
at too high a price.

We can’t have the life we want.
Not here, not now.

I’m leaving because it’s the only
way I can make this right.

I need to disappear so that

Benny, Björn, and you can find
some peace again.

I don’t expect you to forgive me for running,

but please know this: you have been the

brightest light in my life,
and I will carry you with me,
always.

Please don’t try to find me.

I’m doing this for you.
For all of us.

With all my love,

Frida

     Agnetha’s hands shook as she finished reading, tears streaming down her cheeks. The paper fell from her fingers, landing softly on the table.

     “No,” she whispered, shaking her head. “No, Frida…”

     She stood up suddenly, her chest tight with panic. Her voice cracked as she spoke to the empty apartment. “How could you do this? You promised we’d face this together!”

     Her eyes scanned the room frantically, as if hoping for any sign that Frida might still be there. But the truth was undeniable—the apartment was empty, and Frida was gone.

     Agnetha sank back down onto the sofa, burying her face in her hands. Sobs wracked her body as the weight of Frida’s decision crashed over her. She felt helpless, shattered, and completely alone.

     After what felt like hours, still in Frida´s apartment, she pulled herself together just enough to pick up the letter again, holding it to her chest. Her tears had slowed, replaced now by a steely resolve.

     “I will find you,” she whispered to herself, her voice trembling but determined. “You don’t get to disappear from me, Frida. I won’t let you.”

     The thought of Frida alone somewhere, carrying this burden by herself, was too much to bear. Agnetha knew she couldn’t let it end like this.

     Grabbing her coat, she rushed out of the apartment, the letter still clutched tightly in her hand.