Toxicity

Virtual Boyfriend/s

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Toxicity (noun)

1. The quality of being toxic or poisonous.

2. The quality of being very harmful or unpleasant in a pervasive or insidious way.

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Her fingertips would graze the bottles of perfumes as she walked down the store's aisles, some aisles would have earphones, headsets, and other trinkets of gadgets displayed for people to test and look at. Not that she needed one as she had her own back at the house.

The bustling noise of the mall could be heard, the children's laughs and cries of their mother, and the chattering of adults as they passed by the store. This heroine had no distinct features that could be considered conventionally attractive. Her hair was curly and frizzy as it was not cared for, and her eyes were brown, others will always talk about her weight but her height; is the only thing out of the normal as she exceeds the average height within her country.

She grows bored every second she looks around the store but her eyes, however, would catch the attention of a single plush toy. A calico plush! It was small but huggable during rests, it had yellow eyes and orange circles on the right side of the ear and the left part of the body, aligned on where the stomach would be, while the other blotches would be brown.

The drive from the mall and the house she lives at is an hour away, but she didn't need anything else other than the plush toy she just bought. Ecstatic when she got home, already night by then, phone in her hand looking through the messages she might have with her one and only.  Who knew her second boyfriend would be a European she met from a chatting app?

Taking a picture of the plush toy she'd send it to Markus. With no logic, she'd name her stuffed toy Marky, although the plush's eye color and the boyfriend himself have different hues it was nice that she finally bought something for the very first time her plush toy.
With eagerness and excitement in Sophie's voice, she'd call Marky as soon as he was online and wake up to tell her good morning.

Their time difference was no trouble for Sophie as she's usually busy around the morning while Markus sleeps. When she comes home and runs to a private room in her grandmother's house that she and her family temporarily stay at, Markus and her talk for a few minutes, exchanging 'how are you's' and 'how was your day/sleep' before being called for dinner.

She had helped Markus fight his anxiety to where he would be able to talk to her in a voice call for a few hours. She'd reminisce about the past and they both would laugh at how shy he was. Back then Sophie never knew what anxiety was as mental health awareness wasn't prevalent back then.

****

"Why aren't you talking?" Sophie asked softly, her feet kicking as she lay on her stomach at the vacant bed and room she had found. During the night, the rooms are vacant till 10 pm. Her phone would give a notification, a message from Markus himself; 'I'm shy'. Sophie would ponder for a moment.

"If you'd like, you can say hi, unmute, and say hi," She said, this was the first time she'd ever actually heard his voice, although it didn't take the same night to conquer Markus' shyness, it took days and Sophie's patience grew thin.

As a surprise, he did say hi! And Sophie was happy with that progress, she liked his voice, it was deep and soft at the same time, almost comforting, clearly a man. Eventually each day Markus would say 'hi' and 'I'm good' in full-on sentences that they'd talk to each other finally without needing to chat.

****

"Haha, and you say you weren't adorable!" Sophie exclaimed and Markus laughed with her, to Sophie it was perfect, she was having fun. They never fought but just talked and kissed on the call. A habit she won't grow out of.

Sometimes, because they're a couple they would become frisky. Phone sex would happen where they would fap together, sometimes on video call, Sophie never understood the feeling first, it was her first time rubbing her clit instead of humping her hand. Not the very first to show her developed breasts though, that she was proud of.

Markus would always compliment her breasts, she never showed anything other than that and to Markus it was fine. He never lasts long to be fair, sometimes he'd just take 5 minutes tops, and sometimes he'd show himself fucking his ass with a banana which he'd eat after.

Sophie would judge Markus for that but would shrug it off and pretend not to hear it and just laugh. She loved his blue eyes, his defined nose, and his slim body, his hair was straight and kept short but there would be bangs, and his English was fluent. His anxiety, however, worsens.

Markus has a dog, a white fluffy dog, sometimes he'd show Sophie during a video call, they were always together, at night at least as she had no one else to company her despite the big house she lived in, despite she having a cousin she could talk to. Eventually, she would ask Markus to meet his parents, to which Markus would always say no, probably anxious about what they would say about their LDR relationship.

Unconventional.

That's usually what they fought about. "Why won't you even let me greet your friends?" Sophie would ask in an annoyed voice. "Cuz they think it would look weird" Markus would huff back. The arguments would always be ended with phone sex, when they were comfortable enough, they'd do it every night too, with a fight or not.

Sophie would always ask for him to delete any pictures he had of her that were 18+. She grows anxious like him, and both of them develop their anxiety together. Eventually, they would just be on call, not talking but just kissing.

To her it was fine, but to Markus, he was growing bored, this is all in Sophie's pov after all. Markus starts to have less time which Sophie would be sad about but there was nothing she could do. Sometimes Markus would stay up all night and morning then the time they were supposed to be together at Sophie's night time, there was none.

Sophie grows worried as days pass, their messages grow slower and some days she does not get any messages at all. She felt unwanted, unimportant, and alone. This might be the time her anxiety and overthinking started to develop. This was also the year Sophie cried her eyes out and looked depressed, her hand always glued to her phone and notification sounds she would always check asap. The year where he also hosted her without closure and never messaged back. Ending of Relationship.

This is what happens when you date a college dropout and you just turned 14.

****

"So what's your real name?" Sophie asked the few times they had called, surely she wouldn't just ask it out of the blue the first time they had met.  Markus already knew her real name, back then she was called 'Ren'  in the chatting rooms. "I don't really wanna say.." Markus would message at the chat box they are both in, "Pleaasee... it's not fair you know my name and I don't know yours.." Sophie sighed, quite disappointed but wouldn't push further. 

"Fine fine... My name's Vincent." 

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Mr D,

Please please do anything to me just please bring him back... please let him be okay.. just a message please I love him.. please

Sincerely,
Sophie

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