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𝘿𝙞𝙖𝙧𝙮 𝙀𝙣𝙩𝙧𝙮 #1: 𝙏𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠.

March 12th, 2024

God loves you, but not enough to save you. Did he ever even love me at all? I wouldn't need to be saved if he hadn't left me here to rot. I should have been swallowed, or maybe she should have gotten that abortion that she wanted." I." The first time I moved my mouth in an hour, it was dry, but weed does that to you. I was lying on top of my shitty CRV that I got by getting quick cash. Little odds and ends You know how it is when you're broke. You'll do anything to get what you need. I remember being set back so many times due to drugs, and I'm only nineteen. This isn't a cool story, and I'm not sitting in the dark on top of my car roof in the Quickie Mart parking lot because I'm fun and exciting. I can't drive. I'm so messed up. I can't drive, not like I should be driving in that state anyway, but I don't even know where I am; there isn't a Quickie Mart by my house, so I have to be awhile out. I have ebony skin and dark, shaggy hair that covers my dark brown eyes. Dark brown? Why don't you just say black? Because my mama says it's dark brown, and I got tired of arguing, so it's dark brown. I'm 5'2, a high school dropout, a gang member, and an unwanted, used, abused, and beaten-down teen, and I wish that what I was smoking was something stronger, something that would kill me. But doing so would kill her-not my mom, my best friend, the only person in this world I'd apologize to wholeheartedly. You'll come to know that I'm not an apologetic man. I'm Auran Dean Greer. It's easier to beg for forgiveness than for permission, but I don't ever plan on doing either.

-Smoke