Nothing Happened

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"Why classics?

"Pardon?" Selwyn walks from his closet with extra covers and lays them on the floor beside the bed. I run my fingers across the books piled atop his desk. Some of them are new. Others have spines worn with years of repeated handling, clear favorites.

"Your major? Don't you study English literature or something like that?" He huffs a laugh.

"Something like that." His already small smile dips. "In all honestly, I study the classics because it is one of the few memories I have of my mother. One of the few things I do not have to assume we have in common." I nod. Remembering that Selwyn barely knows his mom makes me feel even more grateful for the time I had with my own. He gestures towards the bed in silent command. Following his orders for once, I toss my pillow with the others and climb onto his plush mattress. Sink into his bed with a sigh. This is what I would imagine lying on clouds and marshmallows feels like.

"If your mom were here," I follow his movements with just my eyes, "would you still study literature?" Selwyn pauses mid-step. He sighs, not answering immediately. I give him a minute to think of his response while he turns off the light and lies on his palette. After a little while, I crawl to the edge of the bed and peek my head over. His arm is settled behind his head, golden eyes staring at the ceiling in deep thought.

"I have not the slightest idea. I have not been afforded many options in my life. From a young age, my life has been bonded to another to serve them." Sel's head readjusts. Still damp hair from his shower falls over his face. Air blows from his nose, fanning the hairs to the side. "I have never been my own person. A life of choice is simply not in the cards for me. There is only duty. That is all there is."

A slight pain flares in my chest. Of course that applies to me as well. Now, he is fated to serve me, his king. Before that thought can carry me away he says, "But you, Bree." His eyes connect with mine. "You are the first choice I have gladly made in a long time. I will serve you for as long as you allow me. You are my king in choice and obligation." The feeling in my chest morphs from hurt to something else. Something I can't quite describe yet.

I know he is thinking about the same thing I am.

Cariad.

What it means. What he means.

I can't do... this, right now. Clearing my throat, I look away from him and focus on other things. Like how my head feels like it weighs 20 pounds because of my bun, so I sit up on my elbows and undo it, letting my braids tumble down until I'm ready to sleep. I move them so they hang over the side of the bed. My eyes shift around his room more, noting the little details I missed earlier. In one corner are training swords. Next to those are some of the heaviest-looking dumbbells I've ever seen. They must be at least–

"Bree?"

"Hmm?" When I look down at Sel, I notice the ends of my hair tickling across his abdomen. Moonlight filters through the blinds, illuminating his form. As my hair moves, his muscles ripple with the sensation. His face is tense like he's in pain. "Oh, I'm sorry!" I am about to move it out of the way when suddenly he pushes himself up and kneels in front of me.

His hand reaches up and brushes across my cheekbone. He continues the movement, using the back of his hand to pick up my hair and lay it gently across my back. Selwyn's golden eyes hold mine the entire time. I feel the softest of touches brush against my lower spine and travel up between my shoulder blades. I gasp and my back arches. I must be panting at this point, but honestly, I could be making any sound and I wouldn't be aware. A slow smirk spreads across his pink lips.

His free hand catches a stray braid and tucks it behind my ear while slowly, he leans in to whisper, "Payback is a mother." I freeze. My head jerks away from him.

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⏰ Last updated: May 13 ⏰

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