chp 7

660 9 192

by -mOnshirley

by -mOnshirley

i used my super mega ultra hyper rat donkey unicorn koi fish axolotl tiger pig tazmanian devil walaroo polar bear maggot emu dragon powers to turn back into my human form again.

i was feling so confident, and happy, but what i saw when i came home SHOOCKED me 🤯

my mom was in the living room, drinking a shit ton of beer

"DAUGHTER GUESS WHAT 👹👹👹" she said, now pole dancing in the middle of the room because she was so drunk.

"what?"

"WeLLLLlLlLLLLLlLLL you're a fat pig and i don't have to money to take care of you so...🤪"

"mom, what?" i was beginning to be scared.

"i'm selling you to one direction 🥰"

"YOU'RE WAT?"

"i needed money for my vodka so i sold you to one direction!" the mom thought for a bit.

"is that so wrong?"

i staarted crying... i w-would b-b-be l-leaving ev-ever-ervything i h-had i-in thi-this t-t-t-toOWNnnNN 🥺 m-my n-non existent f-f-f-frwiends and m-my wigs a-and....

i went to my room and slammed the door while tears poured down my delicate porcelain white cheeks...this was depressing, so depressing 😔

i started packing my bags, and preparing myself for a new life. i walked downstairs to find ONE DIRECTION! 😩😩😩😩 *faints*

(an actual a/n from me: i don't know a thing abt 1d btw and i have not done my research sooo...)

"RUFF RUFF YOU PEASANT WE'RE YOUR NEW OWNERS" said the short irish guy who played the sitar

"huh-"

"BE QUIET WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO OUR HARRY STAYLES POOKIE DADDIE BBG!!111!!! 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡" said the emo dude who looked suspiciously like cartman from southpark.

"i wanna suck harry's dick so bad 😩" said the celtic dude with wings

I spoke up. "W-w-w-Where's H-harry...?"

a mysterious voice answered. "Here"

I looked around, to find HRARAYAY STYELELELES leaning by the door smegzily

"AUKADADDASKKSKSKS SENPAI I'M SO SORRY FOR HURTING YOU DADDY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺" i apologized

"IDGAF ABOUT YOU BITCH YOU LOOK LIKE A RAT!😡" harry said madly

"You...you...YOU BUMBLING SHIT MUFFIN😤" i cried, wiping tears from my face.

"YOU LETTUCE HEAD!"

"YOU FUCK WAD!"

"WET SOCK!"

"UNNECESSARY MOVIE SEQUEL!"

"CREAM FACED LOON!"

UGH! i stormed out of the house, ashamed, angry, and depressed...