All I Know So Far • The Hunger Games

Salt in the Wound

Carver follows after Katniss, knowing how terrible she must be feeling. If there's one thing Carver is grateful about being sucked into the Capitol's games so early on is that she's become numb to the celebrations and praises. She knows the depth of darkness that takes permanent residence in her soul. Each life she took left its imprint, and she's aware that no amount of words could allow the light back in.

She walks into the last train car, the door sliding open with ease. The younger brunette stares out the window, not bothering to look behind her. "I'm not in the mood for a lecture. I'll apologize to Effie later–" She stops herself as Carver takes the open spot next to her on the long couch.

Katniss stares at Carver awkwardly, not expecting her to be the one to follow. She clears her throat, "I thought you were Haymitch."

"If I was Haymitch you would've smelled scotch before the door even opened." She breathes out sarcastically, leaning her head back on the cushions.

Katniss can't help the grin that appears on her lips at the wise comment. "I guess you're right."

"Listen," Carver begins seriously. "You don't owe anyone an apology. Especially me." She looks Katniss straight in the eyes causing the bow wielding seventeen year old to stare at her curiously. "I know I betrayed your trust, and as of right now, there is nothing I can say or do to earn it back. But I just want you to know that I'm sorry for leaving you guys the way that I did." She sighs, running a hand through her hair. "I can't go on acting like best friends in front of the camera when you hate me in real life."

"I don't hate you." Katniss counters.

"Well you certainly don't like me." Carver chuckles dryly. "I just figured that maybe I owe you a bit of an explanation... if you'll let me." She says with a hopeful expression.

Katniss looks taken aback by her kindness and decency. She allows herself to relax before silently nodding, giving Carver the go ahead to tell her story. Carver smiles delicately, "I can't give you all the pieces of the puzzle, but I can give you one. I stopped talking to you and Peeta because I had a conversation with President Snow."

The taller Victor feels her heart rate pick up at the mention of his name. Carver doesn't know, but he had paid her a visit as well right before they all got ready to go on camera in Twelve. Katniss shifts in her seat, knowing that telling Carver about her own personal visit won't help anything so she keeps her mouth shut. She stares at her blankly, awaiting for her to continue.

"I was instructed not to communicate or see either of you until the Victory Tour, and that's why I fell off the grid." She reveals. "And I'm sure you can do the math as to why I followed his orders." Katniss nods in response, knowing exactly why. "But the last thing I want is for us to hate each other. We are the only three who experienced the same games. We are connected in a special way. Now I don't like to get sappy, but I liked it better when you trusted me. When we were friends."

Katniss finally speaks up, picking at her nails. "I'm not really good at friends."

"Great." Carver grins. "Neither am I. That's why we got along so well." She scoots closer to the angry teenager. "We don't need all the get-to-know-you crap. I think we understand each other on a different level. Now, I don't need you to trust me again right away, but I was hoping you'd be willing to think about it eventually."

After a short pause, "Okay." Katniss gives in hesitantly. "Thank you for being honest."

"I figured that was a good first step." Carver shrugs before looking out the window and noticing a Welcome to District Eleven gate that stands above the speeding train. "I guess we're here." She points out, excitement completely absent from her tone.