𝐓𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐌𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 | 𝑺.𝑺𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒛𝒖𝒈𝒂𝒘𝒂

𝟐𝟕 | 𝐔𝐧𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐚𝐬𝐭

His usual scowl slowly softens, turning to me with his full attention; his elbow propped up on his knee and legs folded.

Telling him about my past was more difficult, as I started from the beginning. Explaining how my family is a line of slayers from the Sengoku period, and how we've kept our traditions and customs since. Then fast forwarding time to my family's generation, I've explained about what had happened to them. Even admitting I had more than one sibling, Sanemi was becoming a little taken back by it all. Even when I explained about my father's abusive nature, and the sexism within the clan's customs and policy's.  

".........then, my family was annihilated all at once, by demons," I continue, feeling tears stinging the corners of my eyes. "Mother didn't get to give birth to my new sibling, as she was also turned into them demons........killing the baby in her womb.....and watched my siblings drop dead one after the other.........it was all a blur, it was so fast. Only Ryuji and Natsu, one of my older twin brothers survived......"

"Hayami......"

My hand tightens more, feeling a huge weight lift from my shoulders as if talking it out relieved me from bottling it up. It alleviated all that baggage, that I've been wanting to tell him.

Right now that's all I can admit to him, as it felt good to let that out. Though there was more to explain to him, and about my father being alive....I couldn't. It wasn't the right time, because thinking about it only made my fear worse. Sanemi doesn't deserve all my bullshit on him anyway, it didn't matter anyway. 

"You know.......it's the first time you've been honest," He spoke up, making me lift my gaze to meet his eyes in surprise. He nudges my shoulder, his arm wrapping around my waist tugging me closer to him until my body was comfortably leaning against him. "I know it must've took every bit of courage to admit that, and I actually........honoured.......to know that.....I'm genuinely surprise you come from a long line of slayers...."

My head was resting against his broad shoulder, feeling his warmth against me.

"Huh? Really?" Blinking in surprise, as I watch his finger trace over my knee in a pattern. His eyes focused in deep thought, feeling like something was bothering him. His silence made me feel a little concern for a moment, when he parts his lips.

A few times he does so, but backs away from the topic with a heavy sigh.

"I.......had six siblings, they meant everything to me," he spoke up, but the way his voice felt slightly strained left my heart weighing heavily. "Even my own mother........my father however, was just a violent and contentious man........always has to find an excuse to abuse his superiority with strength in harming my family.....and even my mother."

He takes a moment for me to register the kind of situation, his family was once in. I believed this was a past issue that resolved somehow, but I knew deep down this wasn't him trying to seek attention but for him to relate. For him to communicate these feelings, that he's bottling up for years. I'm even appalled by his father, already understanding that never-ending suffering of a parental figure. 

It hurts deep than you realise, only from the aftermath of it all......

"However one day.......my damn father got what he deserved," He spoke up, venom dripping from his voice. "Due to the people's resentment towards him in our village, he was stabbed to death multiple times........meeting a bloody end. This brought freedom to our family, but it left us financially struggling so.....my brother Genya and I stepped up........and helped mother in any other way with our family...."

The dread I felt with him suffering under the torment of his father, made me realise how common we were in that territory. 

".......but not long after, one night our mother never came home," he continues, while sat listening to him. He was so open, yet so reserved knowing this must be so hard to even explain his childhood. "Seen I'm the oldest, I've made sure all my siblings were asleep.......made sure dinner was made......but mother never came home all night. So I left the home for Genya to watch over, whilst I went to search for mother......"