The Confusing Diary of a Very Angry Meerab

Of Dragon ladies, Pixie witches and a Good guy

Dear Diary

Have I ever said that I was always wondered where my suicidal genes come from? Oh, you don't believe I am suicidal? Let me tell you- I have major self destructive tendencies. I am the sort of person who would take a gun, lecture you on the dangers of gun violence and then involuntarily shoot myself in the leg.

Why else would I ask Murtasim to take me home. Listen, there were reasons and good ones, too. Where else could I have gone? Back to that home m where everyone has been lying to me since I was in my diapers.. How could I face my Baba and my mama knowing they're actually not my parents? Could I ask them this question? Could I bear the answers? Hearing this from their mouth would make it just too real and at that moment I did not want reality.

So yes... It made absolute sense.

However, if you really think about it, it didn't really make any sense at all.  To avoid my parents I have to live with my potentially official husband with whom I literally have no relationship or memories of even getting married to. All I ever felt for him was a very nice solid resentment, and some little chunks of hatred when he was specially being annoying, and maybe a little of.. well, admiration. The last part is just between you and me diary by the way.

And then there was  Haya. She was hurt and I was the one who basically assaulted her and yeah, now I have to live with a pixie witch? I must be the only person in this world who gets out of prison and then goes to live with the person that they assaulted and went to prison in the first place for.

Why is my life like this? Why am I like this?

It's genetics isn't it?  One more thing that I have to thank my biological sperm donor for. Because my Baba wasn't like this. it was my sperm donor and maybe he's self-destructive.

The moment Murtasim  got down in front of the Haveli, something warm and familiar came over me. I stared at the big structure and it just felt more.. familiar than I expected. My eyes brightened, and he noticed. He instantly noticed.

"Meerab ?" He asked.

A small smile played over my face.

"Something... is familiar," I said carefully, looking around the Haveli  I had visited  in many times in my life. But this time it just felt different.

He stared at me, his deep eyes black as coal and penetrating. My breath caught, but I dared not look away because I was entranced in his vampiric glamour.

He opened his mouth to speak, and I looked at his lips. I had never noticed before, but he did have the most subtly enticing lips. They were slightly pouty and welcoming. They said 'come taste me, I'll show you a good time'.

"That's good to know ," he admitted, and I studied him.

I nodded. "Where are we going?"

"Home," he whispered in a low raspy tone.

I raised a brow. Before I knew it, we had stopped at the door. I stared at the building before me.

" Ma Begum Kya sochegi?" I had forgotten about the dragon lady. She is a dominative figure in my mind- wrapped in her designer shawls and her pearls, she spoke with authority. As much as her regressive views and passive- aggressive comments irked me, no one can deny that Ma Begum did regressive patriarchy with style.  " Hazaro sawal poochengi main kyun tumhare ghar aa gayi.."

He smiled, and I'm taken aback because.. well.. because ... ugh never mind.

" Yeh tumhara bhi ghar hai"

Oh screw it.

Dear diary , Murtasim Khan  is the most sexiest person in the planet while he smiles.