Songs Of Finchel

Baby Come Home

I woke up this morning
Your pillowcase I was holding
I was only dreaming it was you
I tried my best to let it go
Something wouldn't let me though
I might have been pretending but it's all I can do

Another dream has jolted Rachel awake. She's holding the pillow he uses when he's home on leave. The faint smell of him is still present. Burberry body wash, cologne and Finn. She dreams of the day she'll meet his plane at JFK and he'll stay in New York for good. With her, in their little shoebox apartment near the theater district. He will take his Army training and become a firefighter. She hold that damn pillow like he's there and she doesn't want to let him go. Something won't let her. She doesn't like that feeling.

I've tried wishing on stars
closing my eyes so hard
made deals, made vows, tried screaming out

She's home from her show and she's exhausted. She takes her chamomile tea and head to the balcony. She likes nights like this when it's dark enough to see the stars.  She looks up to find Finn Hudson. She picks the brightest one, because hard as she tries, she still can't read that damn star map. She closes her eyes and begs, makes deals with God or the devil she didn't care. She vows to love him for the rest of her life. In the end she even screams "FINN". She looks up to that same bright star and wonders if he's seeing it too.

In the desert of Afghanistan, Finn finds her star. He pleads and vows makes a deal with grilled cheesus. "Tell me what to do. Should go home or should stay." Just then he sees a shooting star trailing in the sky toward the west. Is it a sign? He's not sure. Then he hears it the blast is just ahead. He sees his men, falling in the night desert. He's tired. He's strong. He's awake. He's weak. He's here. He's there. He's ........ In that instant he knows what he needs to do. But right now he needs to make it through.

Oh Baby come home
I can't go on without you here with me
Oh Baby come Home
the pain gets too strong without you I'm too weak
but nothing I do, Brings you back to me

She doesn't think it can get any hard than it has been. She feels like there are days she doesn't want to get out of bed. The pain of his absence is making her weaker the longer it continues. No matter, what she does, or says he always tells her "Our country needs me babe". Will she ever be enough for him to come back to?

It's getting harder every single day
always thinking that I see your face
I feel you near, I hear your name everywhere I go
But when I realize it's in my head
it breaks my heart once again
it takes some time before it sinks in then I lose control

She tells Kurt and Santana she's seen him again. They tell her she's mistaken. That tether has fooled her before. She can feel him. She sees his name everywhere. The Hudson River. The Hudson Library. The Hudson Valley and Hudson University. Every time her heart breaks just a little more and it's overwhelming. Her friends let her break down and then build her back up. Help give her the strength to get through the separation.

So I'm done wishing on stars
closing my eyes so hard
no more deals, no more vows, I'm done screaming out

"I don't think I can do it anymore Finn. It hurts too much." She tells him on the crackling satellite phone call he gets to make. "There are no more deals to be made and I can't scream anymore. I need you home" "I know babe, I know. Soon though" "Soon is not enough" She hangs up and there are no more tears to be shed. She doesn't know how to feel about that.