Stolas: It's for my daughter.
Blitzo: Ah. Well, make sure she washes it.
Stolas: No! No, no-no-no. I'm taking my daughter to Loo Loo Land, and I was hoping you, Y/N, and your brave little Imps would accompany us!
Blitzo: We're assassins, not bodyguards, 'kay? Plus, Y/N's not a very good guard, no offense to him. Don't invite us to shit unless someone's gonna die.
Stolas: I'll pay you~
Blitzo: Pay me what?
Stolas: Moneyyyy~
Blitzo: Done!
Blitzo hangs up and accidentally slams his phone down on the desk hard enough to smash it to pieces. After a brief annoyed glance at it, he pulls out a megaphone.
Blitzo: M n' M, and Y/N, get in here! We're goin' to Loo Loo Land!
Moxxie opens the door to respond.
Moxxie: Loo Loo Land?
Millie excitedly smashes her head straight through the office door's glass.
Millie: Loo Loo Land?!
Blitzo: Loo Loo Land!
Loona: SHUT THE FUCK UP!!
Y/N: Why is everyone screaming?!
Loona: Now look what you've done! Y/N's upset.
/////
Stolas: That's all settled.
Octavia: Wait, Y/N's going?
Stolas: Yes.
Octavia yelped and jumped up.
Octavia: I can't let him see me like this!
/////
Loo Loo Land. A van with an I.M.P decal spray painted on the side pulls into the rather empty parking lot. Moxxie exits the van and opens the side door. A very cramped Stolas extracts himself excitedly. His daughter exits the van far less excitedly. Y/N followed behind. Stolas dons an apple-themed hat and gestures toward the park gate. Octavia groans and pulls her hat low over her face.
Y/N: No. No. No. No. No. Goodbye.
Y/N turned his back and walked back to the car, before Blitzo grabbed his shirt collar.
Blitzo: Oh no you don't. You were asked for this, and you gotta do it.
Y/N:...Curses
As Y/N stepped into the bustling theme park, his senses were immediately overwhelmed by the cacophony of sights, sounds, and smells that surrounded him.
Blitzo: Now, remember: this is work and work only. Me and my crew are not here to satisfy your perverted bird needs, alright? And Y/N is not here to satisfy your daughters needs.
Stolas: Blitzo!
Y/N and Octavia blushed brightly.
Octavia: Hey... Dad... Do we have to--?
Blitzo: Okay, yeah. Hold on right there, sweetie.
Blitzo turns to Stolas.
Blitzo: If you try fuckin' my little ass in that park, I swear to--
Stolas: You are so cute when you are serious!
Octavia: I'm literally gonna be sick.
Y/N: P-please don't...
Octavia looked at him.
Octavia: I was being sarcastic.
Y/N:...Oh, right.
YOU ARE READING
Helluva Guy (Helluva Boss x Autisic reader.)
AdventureBlitz, a classic demon Imp, sets out to run his own small assassin business with his weapons specialist Moxxie, his bruiser Millie, and his receptionist hellhound Loona. Together, they attempt to survive each other while running a start-up in Hell.
Loo Loo Land
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