Colette Nowa II

Chapter III: Mysteries in Torture

Chapter III: Mysteries in Torture

For the past few months, Colette began working as a suicide counselor which Raphael had helped her maintain. He was her motivation, her life. Raphael had been working in the office until the month of December constantly leaving during the evenings to prepare for the war. The United States knew that the war was to come.
"Do you know how many people are dying?" Colette woke up and started her day in distress, hearing a voice from the kitchen, believing it was a hallucination. Is my father haunting me? Leave me alone. Why is he haunting me? She changed out of her shorts and top into a sweatshirt and jeans.
"This is important." She heard his voice in the distance and realized that Raphael was on the phone with somebody.
            Colette was perplexed by Raphael's tone and hunched stance. "Raphael? What's going on?"
            He stood up tall. "There's a war. A war is beginning. It may be due to the fact of power and control over the seas or trade. I don't know. No one knows. Rest, sweetie."
Raphael had an important mission to save the innocents in a war-torn country. He fought for the good in the world for peace and harmony throughout the days of survival and conquests. He was on the war front team in the CIA, a secret branch in the CIA.          
Colette went to her bed to lie down. She rested her eyes, rubbing them with her hands, stressed from the early morning news that had occurred.
            Raphael was mumbling to himself. "This may break the world or reconstruct the world." He pondered on his responsibilities. The world could end or begin anew from the war. The phone call ended.
            Colette said, "I'm worried."
"Everything will be alright, darling. Everything will be alright." He kissed her forehead.
            Raphael had left every night to make phone calls with agents as Colette was softly asleep. She could not tell - she was a deep sleeper. Trust was as precious as gold. He had cried every morning without her realizing. She noticed today.
"Are you crying?" She whispered.
"Yes."
"It will be alright." He snuggled into the bed with her as she held him.
            Those phone calls were ones that could lead to ultimate misfortunes. But, wonderful new beginnings were always in the mind like Raphael beginning anew with Colette, a new life, wanting a baby, but not at this time when the world was falling ever so slightly toward new beginnings. 
            The missiles had struck. It was midnight on February, 23 2022. There was a war in a far away country battled throughout history in ties with the Eastern and Western world, not knowing the difference, only freedom. And, freedom had its price made by mankind. But, only the sun, some people may call it the universe, controlled true freedom.
Another call rang.
            Raphael was on the phone with a colleague, George Brooder.
            "It's not going to work," Raphael said agitated.
            "Listen to me. And, you better listen closely. If you don't get your ass here in Ukraine. The whole world could end. Do you understand me?" There was a pause. "Do you ... understand me?" George stated cooly in his uniform in the Ukrainian city, Luhansk, aiming at the invaders.
            "Yes." Raphael said sternly, hanging up the phone and proceeding to the apartment where Colette was soundly asleep.
            Raphael worried about the news.
            Colette was waiting by the door. Raphael entered quietly, but was startled when he saw her. He gave her a kiss.
"What's going on?" She begged him.
"We must go to Ukraine. Pack your bags."
His cigarette smells are making me want him more. What does he mean to go to Ukraine? I have no clue as to anything in Ukraine.
"I don't know why we are going to Ukraine, but we have plans to make a family and live a life here. Do you want to ruin that all?" She sighed.
"No, love. It's gravely serious. We must pack our bags now." He said in a hasty fashion with sentiment.
"But, you can't just keep hiding things from me. What's going on?" She copied his tone.
"A war." He lit a cigarette in the apartment and blew out a large puff, continuing. "A war, Colette. This war could lead to the monstrous deaths of innocent lives, children starving. People eating nothing. It could lead to the devastation of the planet. Famine. Hunger. Too much pride comes about in the minds of the invaders and defense." He blew his last breath, finishing the cigarette with a struggle. Without love, there was no strand of hope. Without care, there was no passion.
They packed their bags hurriedly looking for chances to escape, living a life from boredom to survival. There was one chance in that survival or that fate of destiny, whether it was in their will to survive or to perish in fathom. But, only one thing could set them free, and that was kindness, kindness to all the people who may feed off of vultures, and kindness to all the prisoners and soldiers. Kindness for all.
They flew to Poland with the winter's stress carried on their backs. Many people on the plane were returning to their home country. Colette sat in awe with her body unable to formulate what was truly going on. Once they landed, no one clapped on the plane. All assembled neatly in a single file line.
"Czesc. That's all you got to say." Raphael grabbed her hand in the silver-lined airport.
"Right." Colette said with anxiousness.
They checked out their bags out of first class immediately. The United States' government did not know that Colette was on the mission with Raphael. She was his guest. Raphael had removed all the precautions of trouble in advance, disabling his watch when needed with his shoes installed with a recorder.
He just wanted to hold her tightly. He was more scared than she. He wanted to quiver and cry until he did not for she was with him.
They went up the golden escalators, a newly shredded coat of gold. He kissed her forehead.
            Fortitude was in the mind of the beholder; fortitude was in the stronger than the weaker; fortitude was in the brilliance of that only a few had.
            They had a taxi escorted specifically for them - a casual Toyota. Being undercover meant blending in as much as possible. They traveled for 14 hours straight with a backpack full of fruit, sandwiches, and love. They lived like kings and queens giving to those in need, turning dreams into reality with the snap of a finger.
            The Ukrainian people welcomed her with open arms with hugs and kisses and perogies and crepes when they had arrived in Luhansk. Raphael and Colette fell deeper in love with each other like kids on a swingset, singing and dancing in the sunlight with the shimmer of their eyes knowing that the future was good. Knowing that life was immortal, every memory was sacred. It was with their energy that was needed in Ukraine, their love. Nothing vanquished. It was all in the present. She felt as free as a dove.
              In war, you either grow together, die trying, or perish. And, they grew. Ukraine was very close to winning the war, having plans to retrieve Moscow, becoming victorious. The frontline had soldiers from both sides facing each other with guerilla warfare intact. Tanks replaced cars. Americans brought M4 carbines and AK-47s to the warfare for the frontline Ukrainians. With firepower and thorough accuracy, PKM and M240 heavy machine guns were shot closer to the rear. Courageous men and women throughout the country defended Ukraine with passion as the environment became harsher and inevitably miserable. Standing their ground, the Ukrainians won the first battle.
              Raphael and Colette were there to witness the phenomenon towards the rear. People were handing out roses to every single soul, alive or remembered while shouting and kissing with cheer for the small victory.
They arrived to a different city. Crowds surfaced Odessa's train station. There were no airstrikes in that city. They had driven back to the station with George as the driver. All three of them had been talking about the return of World War II in a different manner with everyone relying on the United States for the final say. George had kept Colette a secret from the CIA due to Raphael's knowledge of information against George. George had once dismantled an affair in the past which was a no go for the CIA.
            Through the midst of the people stood an older gentleman with circular glasses and black hair. Colette fainted. Raphael rushed to give her water with a paper towel from the local flower shop in the center of Donetsk.
"I knew this would happen," Raphael murmured to himself as Colette slowly opened her eyes. The gentleman vanished from the crowd. 
"What was that? That man looks exactly like my father from the most recent picture of him that I have of him. Is it him?" Colette responded, shocked to hear his exasperated tone.
Raphael looked down at the floor, then at Colette. "That man is your father."
Colette began shaking in fury.
"What do you mean, Raphael, that he is my father? You knew my father was alive this whole time? And, you didn't tell me!" She trembled in that bright lighted train station. Raphael grabbed her arm, and they placed themselves onto a brown bench by the entrance of the station.
"He was in a special position in training." Colette looked at him with tears in her eyes.
Raphael continued, "I couldn't let you know due to the secret service and especially this war. No one knows that the American government is here. He was enlisted as the Army's Secret Service General. America had been helping Ukraine this whole time. They saved many people, Colette." He said in slight annoyance. "But, there's something else that I need to tell you." Colette was flabbergasted with the news. She did not have the chance to respond to Raphael's words.
"Your father is Ukrainian not Serbian. Your ancestry comes from this land - land that was made to feed the world to become strong; land that was once considered to becoming the promised land. It's a secret treasure." He stopped and kissed her forehead. "And, it's your land now too."
Raphael cocked his head to the side. "I have more to tell you, Colette, but you see - you must meet your father to know your family's story."
"I need to go to the bathroom." Colette got up by herself away from Raphael for the first time in a long time. 
As she walked to the bathroom diagonally from the entrance of the train station, her face turned from a clear white to a blood red instantly. She displayed no punctures nor blemishes on her skin as she washed her face from the tears.
My father had lied to me this whole time? And, Raphael? I feel so stupid as if the whole world had only been lying to me.
Raphael waited, pacing back and forth around the entrance of the park's bathroom.
Colette sighed.
What if this isn't my father, and just some sick joke? What if everything is a sick joke? And, I am only dreaming. No. Don't go mad.
As she walked out of the stall, her father appeared by Raphael's left side. They looked like horses from an unending battle with muzzles risen up high against defeat while understanding that the bear was always watching.
Colette asked her father immediately, "Where were you?" She was shaking from embarrassment.
"Work took me away from you. Colette." Luka lied. His strength and fortitude were shown throughout the years of combat and espionage. He held his arms out in the open for her.
"Is the world free?" Colette asked stupidly as she hugged him tightly.
"It's one step closer, doll." Her father said with compassion.
After they hugged, Raphael had to explain himself. "This was a mission going on since 2014." He paused. "Prior to that, your father had a divorce with your mother."
Luka Nowa stepped into the conversation. "Your mother and I have our differences. I wanted to see you, but she did not allow me. But, she may say something different." Luka looked at his watch intensely. It started moving in circles, but Colette did not notice. She was in her own mind. He stated, "Look a laser!" and pointed at Colette's forehead with laughter pointing it so that she could see.
Colette was puzzled, but she ignored her mind, easier to ignore some things in life rather than to stir the pot. "But, why couldn't you make a stronger effort?" She asked. Raphael was proud of Colette for asking such a question.
"I had to leave the country and serve as a spy in Europe. Espionage isn't that simple." He puffed. "And, what have you been doing smoking cigarettes? You smell like a dog." Her father diminished her. He pulled her to the side as Raphael gave them some space to chat.
"Who is this guy? Do you think he loves you? You know how many women I've told that I've loved them?" He paused. "Look at you. You're psychologically ill. I've heard what your mother told me. Take your medications." He said proudly.
During that time of sprawl, Colette thought:
Especially when atrocities enter, I think of all the pain that enters. Sometimes, there's no escape. You must be delusional to escape - some say. But how? It comes and goes, yet it still remains - the forbidden happiness.
And, what was war? It was distraught, bickering, the search for survival when there was not enough instinct to decide on which route to choose.
Colette raised her eyebrows. She didn't expect him to be quite rude. She didn't expect him to be alive at all.
"Well, I must leave. I have to deal with meetings and so on." He said in a calm manner after his cynical view on society.
Was he bipolar or something? Was this why I had so many problems?
"Right..." She said. They awkwardly hugged, and Mr. Nowa left. He disappeared like most people in her life, but it led her to become stronger. Everyone had stepped out of her life except Raphael.
            When the summers subsided, she tried to become a better person, breaking bad habits. She stopped smoking and drinking altogether. She wanted to find true happiness without these vices. She began reading more, praying, meditating, and finding true passions in creativity by painting and playing the violin.
             On the plane, Colette sobbed quietly as Raphael held onto her shoulders. They had returned to the States after their excursions across Ukraine. It was time for rest. Work had encompassed Colette's everyday routine, waking up in the morning and taking phone calls from people who have given up on finding the light in this life. Colette was there, every step of the way, holding onto an innocent's person hand for all people were innocent only the circumstances were inevitable.
Colette was under loads of stress at her job, but Raphael was always there to heal her gentle soul. She could not stop chainsmoking - hearing the horrible atrocities and despairs of the world. Old habits died hard. Someday, she wished for people to behave like pure nuns and monks, but that was only a façade at times. We all had our vices.
In their petite apartment, they were engaging in conversation on a Sunday morning with a perfect cup of coffee and bagels.
"Raphael." She sighed. "I don't know if I can live this life anymore. I can't keep up. I feel insane."
He grabbed her head and kissed her hair.
"You have to understand that to be gifted in this world you've got to be a little bit crazy."