Humphrey x reader (if someone doesn't request something there won't be any other fics only Humphrey and Negatus ones)
they/them pronouns (also you have long hair) (also autistic and hungarian because I said so)
+++Y/N POV+++
Me and Humphrey have been dating for five years now. I loved him and our relationship. If I had to describe it in one word, it would be comforting. He was my angel. One afternoon we were sitting in one of the clubs Pat has arranged for us. I believe it had something to do with clothes, but I don't really know. Humphrey was sitting next to me, his arm around my shoulder. It was one of the rare occasions when he had his body and head together. I didn't pay attention to the noises outside my head, instead focused on my lover's presence. I was at peace. Then I suddenly felt something tingly. I was confused at first, and more confused at later when I found myself standing in a weird place. There was a desk and a gate in the room. Behind the desk there were sitting three people. All three of them looked like skeletons, but with different hair, and only the one in the middle looked... alive? I mean skeletons aren't alive but whatever. And does it lowkey look like Julian or am I tweaking? I walked in front of the desk. "What's your name and when did you die?" I avoided eye contact "Y/N L/N and 2008 November 25th" (my bday! yay!) he scribbled down on a paper "Okay, and how did you die?" Oh god, here we go. "So, it was at night. Me, my friend and her dog went for a walk in he woods, we didn't know that it was somebody's territory at that moment. We let the dog off the leash, and it started running. I told my friend that I will catch it and she didn't have to worry, so she stayed behind. I ran after the dog, it was a chihuahua by the way, a really fast one too. So I was chasing after it and I saw it jump into the lake. The last time I saw it it couldn't swim so I assumed that it was still that way and jumped after it. But it could swim, and managed to swim out of the lake. An-" "And you drowned!" "No." he looked disappointed. "I swam out, and decided to search for my friend. After I found her I wanted to greet her, but because I was drenched in water ( I still am) and probably looked terrifying, she got scared and shot me. With her gun." "And then you died!" "No, not yet. I lost balance, fell back and hit my head, falling unconscious for half a minute. Then I woke up by jerking up, she got scared again because I thought I was dead, screamed and shot me again. And that's how I died." "AHAHAHahAH!" It WAS a stupid death. A hilarious one, if I might say. "Ahahhah, you're dead funny. You're through to the afterlife." he dismissed me with a hand motion. I stayed. "Actually, can I talk to your manager?" he looked shocked "You mean God?" "Yeah, whatever. I can I talk to them?" "You made my day, so sure. Just go straight and then turn to the right, there is a big pink gate, you can't miss it. But if you get here a second time, you have to tell me what happened." "You got it! Thank you!" I waked in the direction he sent me, and I could hear him say to himself: "I love my job sometimes, I really do.". I found the gate and walked through it.
I found myself in a very white place. Too bright. My eyes hurt. And now my brain does too. I saw something not that bright in the distance, Probably my future, but I still walked towards it. As I neared, I realized that it looked like the iconic 'pearly gates' the Christians like to talk about. There was a person standing next to it. A woman with curly, black hair, brown skin and brown eyes. She greeted me with a smile. "Hello, my child. What brings you here?" I looked up at her, with a deadly stare. This mission required eye contact. "I want to have a little chat with God." She contained her smile. "I am God, my dear child. What would be the problem?" "You will send me back. No questions asked." "But dear, you already moved on. Or you got sucked off, how you might say it. You moved on, you are at peace. You were ready to some here." You can't be serious. "Do you know the difference between ready and ready ready? Just because I was at peace at that moment, that doesn't mean I want to come to a totally different place and leave behind everyone I know." her smile just didn't want to drop "But-" "A ah, no butts! you send me back there, or we gon have a problem, sis." Her face and posture remained unchanged, and continued to protest, that I belong here. I'm going to have a melt down, I need to get to my angel before I start crying.
She is so beautiful. It would be a shame if.... someone drop kicked her. And without a warning, I drop kicked God. I said that we're going to have a problem. "Now. Send me back." I looked at her pathetic form crumbling before my feet. She did a little something with her hand, and I started falling.
I landed on my stomach with a thud. I looked around to find myself in the living room. Oh, thank me! Home, sweet home. I stood up and dusted myself off. A sad and choking feeling came over me, and I knew that if I couldn't find Humphrey in time, I had to go to my safe spot. That was on the roof. I made my way to the roof, and spotted Humphrey sitting there all alone and sad. I was 90% sure that he was sad about me being sucked off, so I decided to snuggle him. He was shocked. "Y/N? But... but you got sucked off! How?" I was in the middle of a melt down so I couldn't speak, just looked at him with big eyes. He smiled at me. I needed that smile. "It's okay. You can tell me later. The only thing that matters, is that you are here now." He hugged me close to him and didn't let go, afraid that he might lose me again. I have no idea for how long I have been gone, but all of this can be discussed later. Now I'm being hugged by the handsomest person dead or alive, so this I don't care about anything else.
hi Pornitos, i hope you like this one, i had so much fun writing this. and if you have any requests, just leave a comment or message me. have a great life!
