healing takes time (none of it is linear)

Chapter 12

"He's not sure if he'll want us around, so we may need to figure out another way to take care of him," Shoto filled in.

"If it's the fact that we're alphas that scare you, then we could probably ask Denks to come over," Eijiro offered.

"Pikachu might have a similar heat schedule, idiot." Katsuki was right about that. If Denki had the same heat schedule, then that plan wouldn't work.

Izuku's cheeks were flushed pink, but he tried to keep back any nerves. "I-I've spent my heat alone before. I can do it again. It-it wasn't that bad." That was a lie, but he didn't want to make them go through more trouble than they had to.

"Babe, I don't think that's healthy," Eijiro said softly, brows furrowed. Izuku didn't talk all that much about his life before them. Vague mentions, maybe, but he was never comfortable with it. "I remember seeing it could be bad for mental health if no one else is around."

"It was fine. My owner at the time left me with food and water and went on a month-long trip. I ended up going into heat while he was gone." He left out the part where he had been locked in a 10ft by 10ft room with only a tiny window, and the food hadn't been enough to last two weeks, let alone 4. He also didn't tell his boyfriends; this was a regular occurrence. He didn't want to worry them.

Katsuki gave him a look. The one he got when he knew something the others didn't. "Izuku, what happened?"

The omega may have shrunk away from him with that, avoiding eye contact. He didn't want to talk about it. "Can we watch something now?" Izuku asked, avoiding the question and pulling away from Katsuki in favour of leaning into Shoto's side.

Shoto gently ran his hand through his hair and kissed the top of his head. "Of course, love." He locked eyes with Katsuki for a moment, silently telling him to lay off for a bit.

Eijiro grabbed the remote and flipped through their options. "How about this?"

He had stopped on a romcom, one that he knew would be extremely cheesy, but he knew it would lighten the mood.

Izuku hummed while Katsuki scoffed. "Seriously?"

"Katsuki, we all know you enjoy a good rom-com," Shoto deadpanned.

"I didn't," Izuku said, looking up at Shoto and then at Katsuki. He wouldn't have ever thought the blond would enjoy a rom-com.

"Kats loves the cheesiness in it," Eijiro chuckled.

Katsuki huffed and crossed his arms, sinking down on the couch. "Shut up," he muttered. "Just start the fucking movie."

Eijiro chuckled and clicked play.

Honestly, Izuku wasn't paying too much attention. He only asked to start the show as a change in topic. He didn't want to talk about it. He didn't want to talk about the things he had been through. He didn't want to remember it.

Izuku tilted his face into Shoto's shoulder, trying not to think of it. How cold he had been. How hungry and in pain. How utterly lonely that month had left him.

Shoto whispered against Izuku's hair. "Love, is everything okay?"

Izuku hummed, not feeling like speaking. Was he okay, though? He felt like he might be spiralling again. But Izuku couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't get himself to say anything.

Shoto's hand ran through his hair, and he felt Katsuki's fingers weaving through his. It did help. Quite a bit, actually.

Eijiro reached for some snacks and glanced at his boyfriends, smiling fondly at them. "It's unfair you two get to cuddle with Izuku. I want in on it too."

"First come, first serve," Katsuki said, sticking his tongue out. "Besides, you already spend the most time with him cuz you work from home."

"Not my fault," Eijiro shrugged. "Still wanna cuddle with him."

Izuku wasn't paying too much attention, more focused on not spiralling.

Now that the memories were at the forefront of Izuku's mind, it wasn't easy to think of anything else. He tried to enjoy himself, but it was tough when the nagging voice was coming back. He knew not to listen to it. He should not listen to it. But it was so very hard when in any other situation and with any other group of alphas, it would have been right.

Katsuki shifted beside him; instinctively, Izuku flinched and tensed.

Katsuki froze when he noticed, looking over at Izuku, confused. "Hey, why are you so tense?" He asked, squeezing the hand he was holding.

Izuku didn't say anything, instead pulling his feet onto the couch and knees into his chest.

"Babe, is everything okay?" Eijiro asked.

"You've been acting weird for a little bit," Shoto added.

Izuku felt his eyes starting to tear up. "I-I don't know," he managed.

Eijiro paused the TV and kneeled in front of Izuku. "Did we say something to upset you? I'm sorry." He looked so worried.

Izuku shook his head. It wasn't their fault. Izuku's brain just liked to screw him over.

"Are you sure?" Shoto asked, trying to ease Izuku back into his relaxed state by playing with his hair again.

The omega nodded.

"You'd tell us if we said something that upset you, right?" Eijiro asked, cupping Izuku's hand in both of his hands. "You wouldn't hold it back because you think that's what we want when we don't, right?"

He nodded.

"You gonna say something?" Katsuki asked.

He shook his head.

"Is there anything we can do?" Eijiro asked.

Izuku thought about that for a bit. He didn't know, but cuddling and being in his nest now sounded like good options. He didn't know how to express that when he didn't want to talk.

He reached his arms out for Eijiro, wanting to cuddle with all three of his boyfriends. When the alpha picked him up, he reached for the others. "Cuddle," he muttered.

"Here or in bed?" Shoto asked.

"Nest," he mumbled again, burying his face against Eijiro's neck.

They were all a little surprised by that seeing as it wasn't often Izuku offered for them to join him in his nest. It wasn't often, but groop cuddles sometimes occurred in the alphas' room.

Eijiro carried him to Izuku's room, and the others followed. They crawled into the nest after Eijiro and Izuku, cuddling up with them. He pulled a few blankets over them and ensured the nest wouldn't be messed up with so many people. But then he was able to settle in.

Izuku tried to relax.

It was easier now.

Much easier now.

It lulled him to sleep soon after.