Yokohama stray dog

1.04

Kocho

- I know you're there. Come out. - he said. The words hit like a truck. Suddenly the air disappeared from my loungs. But after a few moments I regained my composture. After all these years I finally met him again.  Was I ready to face him? No. Was it now or never? Yes.

I sihged and stood up. I walked to the railing. And there he was. Looking up at me with a smirk I oh so wanted to punch off his face. But I grind my teeth kept my cool. I swung my feet over the railing and hopped off on the ground floor. Over a decade of training helped me not to fall face first or breake my leg when I landed. We maintaind eye contact for a while before he spoke.

- You grew up, Kocho. - he said in an irritatingly cheerful tone. Yet again, I wanted to punch him. Or just straight up kill him, it would've been easyer. But I had to restrain myself. So I just bitterly laughed instead.

- Really? You disappear without a word and four years later all you say is,'You grew up'? What kind of bullshit is that?! - I said in a slightly raised tone. Ok, maybe I lost my cool a little, I admit.

- What do you want me to say? That I'm sorry? That I miss you and Chuuya? You want me to tell lies, Kocho? - he answered. That, this right there was a punch in the gut. It felt like he just stabbed me. Even though I knew he doesn't miss me nor he is sorry for leaveing. I just needed to hear it, I suppouse.

- I know you're not sorry. I know you don't miss us. - I spoke and clenched my fists - I always knew you don't love us. The mafia. Chuuya. You were pretending all the time. I knew that if you leave one day, I probably won't ever see you again.

- Yet you're here. -  he spoke up. I nodded

- Yeah, I'm here.  - I agreed

- Why? -  he asked. I froze and thought.

- I don't know. - I answered. 

- It's unlike you to do something without thinking it through first. It seems like being alone with Chuuya affected you a lot. - he said with a chuckle. - But still, this was a really reckless idea. If my collegues found out you're here, they would've arrested you. I could even arrest you right now!

- You won't do that. - I spoke camly

- Oh? Why do you think that? - he asked, even though we both knew why.

- Because it's not good for you. You have no evidence againts me. No evidence means no jail time. And if you did want to get me into prison, you'd have to tell them why you knew I'm Japans best assasin. Meaning: you'd have to tell them about your past. They'd find out you're who they once called the "Demon prodigy" and put you into prison next to me. - I gave the clear explanation

- Impressive. You really are worth calling my best student. So far, at least. - he commented and smirked. I knew what he meant by 'So far'. 

- That Atsushi kid has an impressive ability. I'm eager to see how he'll use it. - I stated

- Don't even think abut getting him for the Port mafia, Kocho. You know you can't win againts me. - he warned

- Don't worry, I would never do that. I'm not the one working on the weretiger case anyways. - I nonchalantly shrugged - But, unfortunately, I do have to tell Akutagawa about what I witnessed today. You know, loyalty and shit. 

- He is working on Atsuhi's case? Well, I think I can relax then. - he said with a smile. I silently agreed. 

- Anyways, I have to go now. Chuuya's gonna be extra mad, especially after I tell him where I was. - I informed him. He nodded. He waved farevell and started walking away. However when he was at the door of the warehouse I spoke up, makeing him halt - Dazai! Was I...any good?

- You were good, Kocho. But not the best.  - he said after a few moments. That last sentence felt like he just turned the knife he previously stabbed me with. I stayed silent, not looking his way anymore. I listened as the sound of his footsteps slowly faded away. 

I don't know how long I stayed in the warehouse. I don't know why, exactly. All I knew, is that I wanted to scream. I worked so hard to live up to his expectations, but he just told me I was never good enough. I wanted to scream all these years of pain out of myself. But I knew I couldn't. Did I even know how to scream, how to cry? Have I ever cried? I didn't cry when my parents died that day. I didn't cry when my brother never returned. Why? Just why do I feel like I want to tear the world apart and flood it with my tears? Now out of all times? All because of him. 

I took a deep breath and put my useless feelings to the side. Chuuya was still waiting for me at home. It's been almost an hout since we spoke on the phone, he must be worried by now. I walked back into a city and called myself a taxi so I can get home faster. And also because the minute I sat in the car it started raining. How comical.

It didn't take long to arrive at the place Chuuya and I lived at. It was a skyscraper close to the Port Mafia headquarters. I got in the elevator and pushed the button for the highest floor. Since a part of the wall was a one way mirror, I could admire the night city from inside, takeing my mind off tthings. Mainly the lecture Chuuya has in store for me. When the elevator door opened I was greeted with the entrance of our home.

- I'm home! - I called out as I entered our apartment. I was greeted with silence. As I changed into my slippers and put my coat on the haner I figured Chuuya went to sleep early today. Oh boy was I wrong! As I stepped into our living room the first thing I noticed was him sitting in an armchair, a glass of wine in hand looking furious. 

- Where were you?! - came the question. It took him a lot of will to hold himself back from yelling at me, I could heart it in his voice.

- I'm sorry. - I apologised and immediately explained everything. He listened without a word, and even though not fully, he was calmer by the end of my explanation. Yeah, I might've left out the part about my meeting with Dazai.

- I see. - was all he said as he sat the wine down on the table - So you know about the weretiger now. That's good. But still, don't go on sudden missions all by yourself again. At least call me first so I know you're ok.

- Yes. I'm sorry, Chuuya. - I said. I felt a little guilty about not mentioning Dazai, but it was for the best. It was my problem to deal with. 

- Do you have work tomorrow? - he asked. I thought for a second.

- No. But I will go in to give the info to Akutagawa. - I answered. He just nodded.

- Still, don't stay up too late. - he said.

- I know. I think I'll go to sleep now. I'm exhausted after today. - I informed and started leaving the room - Good night.

- Good night. - he wished back. I knew he wasn't gonna go to sleep yet. I knew he won't, untill he passes out from the alcohol itself. I felt guilty causing him so much stress today. But it also made me feel kind of happy. At least he cares abut me enough to stress abut me. Yeah, that's right! Why should I care abut Dazai when I have Chuuya by my side?