i cried all night,
i couldnt stop. i feel like my heart is gone. like i dont have a heart left.
i kept telling myself that i dont need him, but, i do.
he can probably hear my never ending sobs, but he obviously doesnt care.
no one cares. why would they? why would someone, in their right mind, care about a stupid ugly asshole of a girl?
thinking of my flaws, i cried.
until crying turned into sleep.
and thats when everything,
good and bad, faded.
✱
i woke up, today is another pressplay day, i wiped my face, and got up.
i yawned, and walked over to my suitcase, i unzipped it and pulled out a suit. i started with high wasted refuge denim shorts, and a cute blue and white floral shirt.
i wanted to look nice today, which obviously wont happen because, well, look at me.
i straightened my hair until it was flat as a board.
i put a light bb cream on and contoured my face.
i fleeked my eyebrows and perfectly winged my eyeliner on every eye.
i put mascara on until i couldnt anymore, curled them, and applied some tan lipgloss.
i looked into the mirror, i sighed, i guess i look kind of better. but not good enough.
i grabbed my iphone, pressplay verification necklace, and left.
my eyes are still a little puffy and red from crying last night. i guess i cried when i was sleeping too.
i walked down the hallway, looking at my hair almost touching my thighs, i look like frikin repunzel right now.
i sighed, and opened the elevator door.
michael was standing there, with a blank face.
"hey mike" i said, walking into the elevator.
"hey, are you k?" he asked, pointing at my face, i didnt realize i was crying.
"shit. uhm, yes. im fine." i said, wiping my tears,
"christian has been really sad too, is something up between you two?" he asked. i shook my head no.
he sighed and nodded, but walked back to his room.
i clicked L and the doors shut.
the doors opened shortly after and i walked towards the convension area.
✱
"hi!" i greeted one of my fans as they were walking up to me.
"hi! i love you so much!" she said, almost in tears.
i hugged her and we took a selfie.
"sorry, my brother is here. he is over there" she pointed at him, he smiled at me and i returned the favor.
let me explain him for you,
hes tall, maybe like 5'11.
he has brown hair and bright blue eyes.
hes not that bad lookin at all, i must say.
we hugged one more time and they left to meet the next person.
