Scooby-Doo! Mystery Incorporated (Male Reader)

The Horrible Herd

Y/N: Okay, that's a violation. Why are you giving us dumpster food?

Waitress: Another of the local farms has been mysteriously destroyed. The fifth this week. It's really messing with our food deliveries.

Fred: Mysteriously destroyed?

Back at the destroyed farm, the farmer and wife are packing when the gang arrives, and Scooby sees the farmer.

Farmer: You!

Scooby: Farmer.

Farmer: Dog.

Scooby: Lock up any innocent animals lately?

Shaggy: Like, okay, you two, we know you've got history, but go easy on the animosity there. Remember, your girlfriend is watching, Scoob.

Scooby: You're right. Sorry, Nova.

Nova is rolling around in the dirt.

Scooby: I just love the way she rolls in the dirt.

Daphne: Excuse me, Mr. farmer.

Fred: What happened to your farm?

Farmer: Farm? I ain't got no farm. It's gone, all of it. That horrible herd ate everything except the silo. Martha, we are leaving.

Shaggy: Like, did I just heard you say hear? I mean, uh, ha, ha, ha, hear you say herd.

Fred: Herd of what?

Farmer: Skull cattle. Ugliest darn things.

Velma sees hoof prints in the dirt.

Velma: Guys, look at these weird hoof prints. They don't make any sense.

Farmer: If you really want to get all nosy about it, you should talk to the other farmers in the area. The herd paid them a visit, too.

The farmer and his wife drive off. At the Farmers Barrel of Crackerness they hear a similar tale.

Fred: So, you're saying that this herd of skull cattle also destroyed your farm?

Woman: What's the matter with you? You got potatoes in your ears, huh?

Fred: Huh?

Fred checks his ears as Y/N facepalms himself.

Y/N: Not at the moment he does not.

Fred: I once had luminescent swamp moss stuffed in my ears when I was trapping toads as a baby. But it came out. Eventually.

Velma: Aye. Please, go on.

Woman: Like a plague of locusts they was. Coming out of the night, they devoured everything in their path.

Man: I reckon she's right.

Scooby: Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Yeah, dog? You've got a question?

Scooby: I do. What's to eat around here? My girlfriend Nova's hungry.

Shaggy: Like, Shaggy is, too.

Woman: We got crackers and crackers.

Shaggy: Anything else to add a little, I don't know, flavor?

The woman gives them a large bowl of cheese.

Woman: We found this here sweet cheesy stuff on the road after them skull cattle went by.

Velma: Road kill sweet cheese? That is just Beyond disgusting.

Scooby, Shaggy, and Nova eat it.

Scooby and Shaggy: Speak for yourself. It's sweet cheese-errific.