The Desire

" Better Day "

I gave up not in the mood to fight, zahara hugged me while I watched sidharth confused. He too kneeled in front of me rubbing zahara's back who cried.

" Kya hua baby, why are you crying?"

" Baby sissy "

She says looking at me, sidharth just smiled picking her up in his arms, he held my hand in his indicating me that we have to say to her. I nod my head understanding, we sat on the couch while zahara sat in the middle but partially clinging to sidharth the dogs too walked near us and coco sniffed my belly sensing and rest his head on my lap.

" Zahara mumma and I have to tell you something "

Starts sidharth looking at zahara who listened to us attentively, I squeezed sidharth's hand encouraging him.

" You know how you were asking for a baby sissy. Mumma is pregnant and you might having a sibling "

" But zahara you need to understand that it might be a baby brother or a baby  sister and you need accept him or her "

Said sidharth zahara nodded her head instantly , she squealed when tony licked her face.

" Baby?? "

She asked looking at the door, I laughed seeing her excitement.

" Why would be the baby come from door?? "

" Package!! "

She said in gibberish making sidharth crack up even more, I laughed watching my innocent child while sidharth tried explaining him.

" Zahara the baby is in mumma's belly"

" Mumma ate the baby "

She screamed horrified thinking about that I ate the baby, I kissed her forehead slapping sidharth's arm who just laughed listening to zahara.

" No zahara I didn't eat the baby, the baby is in my tummy sleeping "

I said she looked at me confused but couldn't ask anymore questions as her dada picked her up playing with zahara.

" Where is my 100 Euro?? "

Spoke Sebastian smugly remembering I had to pay him for the bet  I rolled my eyes forgetting he isn't in front of me but transferred him the money online .

" See easiest way to win money and I  was right but I never knew you would get knocked up "

" Shut up!! I just said I would give him a chance which I'm still sticking to it. If he messes up..... "

" Than what would you do?? leave him and find a new man "

" Funny!!! I didn't laugh at all. I wouldn't be dating anyone "

" As you should "

Said sidharth listening to me and Sebastian, sebastian laughed on the other side while I rolled my eyes listening to sidharth.

" When are you guys coming back?? Don't forget you have to be here before the restaurant representation "

" I will be there, did you forget I have a marathon to run this month end "

I say talking to Sebastian sidharth looked at me unimpressed working on his laptop listening to me and Sebastian after bidding him a good bye , sidharth decided to talk making me groan as I got caught by him.

" So you had a bet that I wouldn't be changing your mind about us "

" No I just needed to pay him 100 bucks "

" I don't believe shit, and what the fuck do you mean by planning on taking part in marathon while you are pregnant. I'm so not agreeing for this "

" Sidharth I have been training for 7 months now, don't stop me "

I whined like a baby he shook his head, I felt my eyes blur with tears.

" Tu haar baar aisa kyu karta hai, I hate you "

I say stomping my feet like a little kid walking out towards zahara who rolled her eyes at my crying face making me cry even louder . She immediately hugged me tapping the back of my head with her tiny hands while I just wipe my tears.

" Seriously an one year old is comforting you, baby why do you need to cry "

" Sidharth I'm going through a lot off emotions you wouldn't know "

I say blowing my nose, zahara made a crying face watching me cry I instantly wiped my face hugging her . Sidharth rubbed my knees.

" Shehnaaz this is new thing for me, I wouldn't understand what you are going through as I haven't experienced this before can you please bare with me "

" Sidharth I know it's your first time but you are being really controlling and it's annoying me "

I spoke  telling him the truth about how I'm feeling, ' I do appreciate his concern but at one point I feel it's an order and controlling which I'm not used too ' I thought he kissed me.

" I'm sorry if you are feeling controlling , but baby try to understand me too and so would I "

He said kissing me again, zahara pushed sidharth away from me coming in middle hugging sidharth.

" No my dada "

I woke up having the same nightmare I had a year ago, sidharth wasn't next to me which means he left for work I check the clock to see it's 4 am in the morning I saw a note from him.

  If you are awake due to the same nightmare again than don't think about it. I know I'm not there right now for you there was emergency but I will be back soon.

Don't get angry, I'm sorry.

Love sidharth

I lay back keeping a hand over my belly, zahara slept next to me sound asleep while I couldn't stop myself if this how things would be in the future too ' another baby is on it's way and I'm still having the same nightmare it's like I can't get rid off it. And sidharth isn't here again, but this time he did mention me he got to go but why do I feel it's going to be like this and I wouldn't be his priority again. I know he is trying so hard but little things like this is giving me more insecurities ' I thought brushing zahara's hair I kissed her forehead sleeping next to her. Thinking tomorrow would be a better day.