Challenge (MxM) (COMPLETED)

Chapter Thirty Two- Worries

Chapter Thirty Two-

Noel

It's been a week. What I did was bad and I think the punishment was totally justified. I deserved it, but something went wrong in my brain. I started all of this with the intention to be the best sub ever, and being a brat doesn't take away from that. It's just that there's a fine line between being a brat and being a bad sub. I crossed it.

For a split second, I wasn't a sub or a brat. I was a bully, and I don't want to be like that anymore.

I don't want to make excuses, but it's been hard trying to find an outlet. I used drugs and alcohol and sex as a way to let loose and relax, but now it's like I'm walking on eggshells. I feel weird teasing Dax now because he just lets me do whatever I want. I called him a dickhead the other day and he just turned around and walked away from me.

I know that I'm supposed to be taking a break from being a sub, but that was my outlet after I quit all the other stuff. It was like a fun game. I tease Dax until he gets fed up and punishes me or laughs it off and fucks me until I see stars.

Now I don't have either and it's like I'm always frustrated and bored. I want something fun to happen.

I groan in frustration, grabbing the remote to turn off the porn that I bought on Dax's credit card. I guess I'll just have to entertain myself from now on. I roll off of the couch with a deep sigh and walk to the fridge, throwing the door open to grab two lunchables.

When I asked Dax to get them for me, I swear he almost threw up in his mouth, but I managed to convince him.

He went on and on about how he could hire a cook and how foods like that have a shit ton of preservatives. I reminded him that I grew up on shitty foods because Sawyer didn't make enough money to feed us all and had to use food stamps most of the time. He didn't argue much after that. He's trying. I know he is.

Every day, I visibly see him trying to correct the way he was taught to think. He doesn't refer to me as 'poor' anymore. He usually says things like 'less fortunate' now which still isn't great, but it's better.

He openly admitted that he thinks Mateo is very smart even though he never graduated high school.

He went to Will's soccer scrimmage against a girls team and pointed out his own sexism after he mentioned that he always assumed that men's teams would be better to watch.

I've figured out that if I ask him 'why' enough then he'll realize that his ideas are problematic. He said that he always thought that men's teams were more interesting to watch. After asking why a bunch, he got to the root of the problem which is that he thinks men are inherently better at sports.

Considering that's just flat out wrong, he agreed to watch more women's sports.

I know he's not perfect, but I'm no stranger to hard work. Actually, I love a challenge, and Dax is the biggest one I've taken on.

I close the fridge and climb on top of the counter to reach the cabinet that Dax puts his alcohol in. I debate for a moment, but settle for grabbing his bottle of Hennessy white.

I climb off the table and head to the front door, opening it before walking down the hallway that leads to the elevator. When I get to the entrance, I glance around, smiling when I see Fabian.

"Hey. You hungry?" I ask, tossing him a lunchable. He catches it, and tries to hide a smile as I lean back against the wall and slide down until I'm comfortably seated on the floor.

"I'm sure Mr. Whitlock doesn't want you drinking his alcohol, Mr. Grayson." He nags as I place the bottle next to me.

"I don't really care. Maybe he'll finally decide to punish me and then fuck me so hard my screams echo off the walls." I respond. I see his cheeks turn red, but he just rolls his eyes and tries to ignore me.