coming undone! | gayeon

chapter 9

"Who's that?" A woman's voice came from inside the flat, and Jooyeon sighed, and before turning towards her, he threw Jiseok a look, as if assessing again the way he looked.

"No one, give me a second!" he replied, his fingers tightening on the door handle as if he were about to close it. "Jiseok, why the hell did you show up now? I thought it was over."

"Over? I still... I still miss you." He muttered, one hand resting on his own lips, as if he were ashamed of this fact. He looked up at Jooyeon, but to his surprise, he was already glaring at him.

They were both observing the other one with such puzzling gazes that no words were enough to describe them. Their eyes looked at themselves with such attention and accuracy that they could almost read each other's thoughts.

"Jiseok, I don't think it's the right time," Jooyeon stated, still holding the door with one of his slim hands. He was the first one to break the eye contact, which made him feel overwhelmed. He couldn't lie; he still thought of him, but he was afraid the relationship would be too damaging. By looking at him, he was one step closer to giving up, which he didn't know if he liked.

"Are you mad at me?" Jooyeon just sighed; he was indeed angry with Jiseok. It was the most obvious thing in the world. "I am sorry for everything." Jiseok leaned towards him. He stepped on the stairs to get closer to him, as if being at an already very short distance was too little. "Can we... talk? Shouldn't we?" His voice broke, and Jooyeon took a deep breath and scanned the boy for the last time before making any decisions.

"Alright, just do it quickly," he replied, letting the air out of his lungs. He didn't know why he was doing it. He didn't know if he felt sorry for him or if he had decided to do it because he kept thinking about him-or both.

He saw the light and a hint of hope burning in Jiseok's eyes. Again, he didn't know how to feel about it.

They made their way to the house, heading towards Jooyeon's room. Jiseok had been here several times, which made Jooyeon feel some kind of nostalgia that squeezed his stomach. They talked here a lot of the time; they smiled at each other, laughed, hugged, or kissed. Now he had mixed feelings; it was bittersweet between them, and it could be seen in his unsure facial expressions.

"Jooyeon, who is he?" His mother brought up the topic again, this time facing the two boys. Her eyes scanned Jiseok with brutal precision, and she was surprised by his sight. He was drunk as hell with his wobbly movements, droopy eyelids, and red cheeks.

"Gaon?" Another girl; it was Jooyeon's sister. She was staring at Jiseok with her mouth hidden behind her small hands and her body bent over a big green sofa.

"You know him?" His mother addressed these words to Jae, who nodded with a proud look on her face. Even above this emotion, there was surprise flushing through her whole body. She didn't know why he was there or how the hell he and her brother knew each other.

She looked at Jiseok, who froze behind Jooyeon's back, and then at the mother to announce her next words.

"Well, he's the rockstar who-"

"He's not, Jae," he mouthed while looking at her with a fierce look. "He's my friend."

Their mother didn't care about the last sentence at all; she gazed at Jae as if striking her with her eyes until she explained what it was all about.

Jooyeon decided to bypass this conversation, and by giving Jiseok some signs with his hands, they moved up the stairs. He was trembling a bit, he didn't know where the conversation would lead, but there he was now-with Jiseok in his room again.

The usually bright room seemed really overwhelming now. It seemed as if the light-pink walls were eating them up and the rug on the floor was grabbing them by their feet.