A Villain for Christmas (The Holyoake Christmas Series, Book 2)

Involuntary Character Study

"He's not! He dragged me to his family dinner, because they've got this mad idea that we were childhood sweethearts! Which is complete rubbish because we didn't even talk then! We weren't even friends! And these days he's a successful, self-made man, who looks like Giambologna's Oceanus and casually listens to Márquez audiobooks! And he'll leave Fleckney before December 24th. So, no, he's not the one!"

That was, most definitely, the largest number of words Billie had directed at her closest relatives in at least twenty years.

A pause stretched, and then Phee exclaimed, "Oh Sybbie!" - and pushed by Delia and their Aunts, and threw her arms around Billie. "Oh Sybbie, I'm so sorry!"

"What–" Billie rasped out.

Delia took a long stride forward and wrapped around the two of them.

"Oh Sybil," she exhaled - and Billie felt her sister's perfect long fingers thread into Billie's short curls on the back of her head. "Oh, you poor thing," Delia murmured.

"But–"

Billie just couldn't suss out what was happening here! Aunt Thelma was next to add to this oddity a second later.

"It's going to be alright, Sybil dear. You're strong, you'll get through it."

Her embrace didn't add much pressure to the familial 'clinch' - unlike Aunt Hazel's physiotherapist's grasp.

"Courage, Sybil!" Aunt Hazel exclaimed. "Everyone has to go through this at least once!"

She forcefully patted Billie's shoulder, the only part of her sticking out of this 'Harewicke knot.'

"Through... what?" Billie's head was starting to spin.

Aunt Sophia was the last one to join this bizarre pantomime, but not for lack of trying. She'd just needed a moment to press her hands to her chest and look over the 'Billie-centred Swiss roll' with a mawkish expression, before hugging them as well.

"Our poor girl," she cooed. "We're here for you, babber."

Billie hadn't been called 'babber' in twenty plus years! What the fuentes, vargas llosa, márquez, roa bastosa, and asturias, put together?!

The clarification to Billie's frantic confusion came from Delia and, of course, said more about her than about Billie's situation.

"I myself will never understand a romantic heartbreak," Delia announced with pathos. "But we will support you through yours, Sybil."

What in the name Joyce's stream-of-consciousness?!

"We will, Sybbie," Phee chimed in. "And it doesn't matter what a marvel he is! Don't bring yourself down! You should value yourself more!"

Billie thrashed, wiggling and shimmying her shoulders, and weaselled out of this unprecedented multi-layered physical contact.

"What are you all talking about?!"

Five pairs of sympathetic eyes fixed on her.

"You're in love with the boy, aren't you, babber?" Aunt Sophia asked softly.

"What?!"

Billie's shriek echoed through the cottage. A couple of cats, who'd earlier sneaked in after the humans and grabbed the chance to invade her bed and desk, darted towards the door.

"It's understandable, dear." Aunt Hazel shrugged. "He's a dish. It's been years since I saw such glorious teres muscles. To say nothing of those glutes!" She hummed, probably savouring the mental image.