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Chapter Twenty Three: Karma

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Remember when I said nothing could damper my mood today?

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Remember when I said nothing could damper my mood today?

Yeah.

I didn't mean that as a challenge, universe.

There are dozens of fire houses in San Diego. Dozens of teams. Dozens of battalion chiefs. And out of all of them, Ryan just so happens to work directly under my dad.

What are the odds?

When I found out that Ryan was a firefighter, I guess it occurred to me that their paths might cross, but never in a million years did I dream that they worked so closely together. I thought my dad's promotion to battalion chief meant he would work more on the administrative side of things, but it's not like we've been close enough to talk about the ins and outs of his position lately.

Maybe this is a sign. Or karma. Maybe I never should have slept with my boss to begin with.

As I drive Hallie home from school, I'm reeling, still trying to make sense of this and how I could have been so stupid.

Why didn't I ask more questions? Why didn't I ever take Hallie to visit her dad at work? Why did this have to happen the second that things were headed in the right direction, with both Ryan and my dad?

I want to say this doesn't change things, but how could it not? Ryan loves his job and he's good at it, and it certainly complicates things now that we know my dad is his boss.

Not to mention that Ryan clearly wants things between us to stay a secret. He swooped in to keep it that way before I really even had a chance to react. I don't like the idea of keeping things quiet like we should feel ashamed or guilt or like it's wrong, and a part of me is hurt that Ryan does.

Hallie and I spend the afternoon at the park and stop to have pizza for dinner. By the time I get her to sleep, I've worked myself into an absolute frenzy. I don't think this was the kind of pent up energy Ryan was counting on when he left here this morning.

I watch the clock as every single minute passes. 8:23PM. 8:37PM. 8:59PM.

9:01PM.

He's late.

By the time 9:30 rolls around, I'm sure he's just avoiding this all together. When I'm about to give up, I hear his key slide into the lock and my heart nearly stops as the front door opens.

Ryan walks into the kitchen with an unreadable expression on his face. He looks tired and worried and his mind is so far away that he doesn't even realize I'm sitting here at first. When he looks up to see me, he softens. "Hey."

"Hi."

A thick silence hangs in the air and I wait for him to speak first. It takes a minute, but finally, he does.

"You don't go by the last name Morgan..."

It's more of a statement than a question, but I answer him anyway.

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